Desertgirl
10-12-2007, 10:40 AM
Memo #1:
Management wishes to assure the company it will continue its policy of training employees through our Special High Intensity Training (SHIT). We take pride in the amount of SHIT our employees receive. We have given our employees more SHIT than any company in this area. If any employee feels they do not receive enough SHIT on the job, see your immediate supervisor. Your supervisor is specially trained to make sure you receive all the SHIT you can stand.
And, once again, thanks for all your effort.
The Management
Memo #2
It has come to my attention that some employees are not following our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T.). We are trying to give employees more SHIT than anyone else.
Employees who don't take their SHIT will be placed in DEPARTMENTAL EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T.). Those who fail to take DEEPSHIT seriously will have to go to EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T.S.H.I.T.). Since our mangers took SHIT before they were promoted, they don't have to do SHIT anymore, and are all full of SHIT already.
If you are full of SHIT you may be interested in a job training others. We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LECTURE LIST (B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T).
Those who are full of BULLSHIT will get the SHIT jobs, and can apply for promotion to DIRECTOR of INTENSITY PROGRAMMING (D.I.P.S.H.I.T.)
If you have any further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF TRAINING Special High Intensity Training(H.O.T.S.H.I.T.)
Thank-you.
Boss-In-General
Special High Intensity Training (B.I.G. S.H.I.T.)
Management wishes to assure the company it will continue its policy of training employees through our Special High Intensity Training (SHIT). We take pride in the amount of SHIT our employees receive. We have given our employees more SHIT than any company in this area. If any employee feels they do not receive enough SHIT on the job, see your immediate supervisor. Your supervisor is specially trained to make sure you receive all the SHIT you can stand.
And, once again, thanks for all your effort.
The Management
Memo #2
It has come to my attention that some employees are not following our program of SPECIAL HIGH INTENSITY TRAINING (S.H.I.T.). We are trying to give employees more SHIT than anyone else.
Employees who don't take their SHIT will be placed in DEPARTMENTAL EMPLOYEE EVALUATION PROGRAMS (D.E.E.P. S.H.I.T.). Those who fail to take DEEPSHIT seriously will have to go to EMPLOYEE ATTITUDE TRAINING (E.A.T.S.H.I.T.). Since our mangers took SHIT before they were promoted, they don't have to do SHIT anymore, and are all full of SHIT already.
If you are full of SHIT you may be interested in a job training others. We can add your name to our BASIC UNDERSTANDING LECTURE LIST (B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T).
Those who are full of BULLSHIT will get the SHIT jobs, and can apply for promotion to DIRECTOR of INTENSITY PROGRAMMING (D.I.P.S.H.I.T.)
If you have any further questions, please direct them to our HEAD OF TRAINING Special High Intensity Training(H.O.T.S.H.I.T.)
Thank-you.
Boss-In-General
Special High Intensity Training (B.I.G. S.H.I.T.)