Bitter sweet day

Just got home from watching my kid play a stellar football game. To see that kid rip off several big yardage gains was a proud dad moment and even sweeter to see him ride that high. He doesn't usually start but got the call today. Very proud of him. During the game I got a call from my father to have him inform me that he has a malignant tumor in his kidney. He hasn't received the clearance yet from his insurance to get it operated on yet which is disheartening to say the least. I hope/pray for the best and he's a young (at heart) 75 and strong so I am hoping that works in his favor. I am still numb and stunned from the conversation but I will remain positive for a healthy outcome. Most likely he'll be operated on in November. Sorry for the vent but it helps to write this stuff out and beg for prayers and strong will. Thanks

Sorry to hear your bad news. Try to enjoy and celebrate your sons accomplishments and stay close to your family, you will need their love and support ahead. I will pray for you and your family. God bless!

jonnyd said:

Sorry to hear your bad news. Try to enjoy and celebrate your sons accomplishments and stay close to your family, you will need their love and support ahead. I will pray for you and your family. God bless!

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Thank you. The timing of this whole thing is a little strange. I leave with my father in an hour to go to Sedona for a few days of R&R. It will be some good father/son time to relax and enjoy the time.

Enjoy the time with your pops. It sounds like you guys are close which will help him with the fight.

How wonderful to be able to spend time with him. Sounds like you have much love for each other. Enjoy your time together!

Damn. Thoughts and prayers.

Prayers to your entire family.
Ask the doctor lots of questions. Don?t be afraid to ask for a second opinion.

Best wishes to your family Scott.

Thoughts with you and your family Scott, and for ur pops

Eff cancer!

Your family is in our prayers Scott, good you are able to be there with him during this time.

jonnyd said:

How wonderful to be able to spend time with him. Sounds like you have much love for each other. Enjoy your time together!

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I spent as much time with both of my parents as I possibly could, it was uplifting on so many levels. Prayers sent...

Sorry, Scott... damn.

Have a nice time in Sedona.

Positive thoughts from Robin & I.

Prayers sent to you and your family. Always hate to hear about the c word.

Thoughts are with you and your family Scott. I wish your Dad luck on his soon to be removal and hoping for a speedy recovery. Kick that crap in the ass!

Praying for your Father and your family.

Keep your head up. :thumbup:

Just having a little fun on some hikes. 👍

Tamalewagon said:

Just having a little fun on some hikes. 

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Looks bitchen! We always talk about hitting up Sedona, but have yet to do it.

Tamalewagon said:

Just got home from watching my kid play a stellar football game. To see that kid rip off several big yardage gains was a proud dad moment and even sweeter to see him ride that high. He doesn't usually start but got the call today. Very proud of him. During the game I got a call from my father to have him inform me that he has a malignant tumor in his kidney. He hasn't received the clearance yet from his insurance to get it operated on yet which is disheartening to say the least. I hope/pray for the best and he's a young (at heart) 75 and strong so I am hoping that works in his favor. I am still numb and stunned from the conversation but I will remain positive for a healthy outcome. Most likely he'll be operated on in November. Sorry for the vent but it helps to write this stuff out and beg for prayers and strong will. Thanks

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Congrats to your son....Sorry to hear about you dad.

Hopefully this works out for the best. A friend had cancer in one kidney a few years ago, and had the entire thing removed. He's been good for about 5 years now and just hitting 72 and is clean.

Best wishes for your Pops. Prayers for a positive outcome.

Sedona is a great place to spend time. Amazing views with some awesome hikes.

Congrats on your son getting some play time too!

Crappy news for sure my friend. Keep your head up. Probably nuthin. Hope to be see'n you soon. :thumbsup

Scott, I sincerely hope your dad will be ok, my heart and thoughts go out to you. I will think positive and hopefully all turns out for the best!

~Jason

Thank you guys for the positive thoughts. Helps to keep me strong for him. My heartfelt appreciation to all

Operation date is set for 12/1. I asked why he couldn't get an earlier op date and the doctor's office blamed in on the insurance company and the insurance company blamed it on the doctor's office. Oy. :grumble:

Tamalewagon said:

Operation date is set for 12/1. I asked why he couldn't get an earlier op date and the doctor's office blamed in on the insurance company and the insurance company blamed it on the doctor's office. Oy. :grumble:

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Hang in there buddy...

I'm going to agree with Bill...fuck cancer! The first Dr. misdiagnosed the cancer type and wasted 30 days. Instead of being fully involved in the treatment, Dad just started treatment yesterday and is currently between stage 3 and 4. Not the news I was hoping for but I have hope. The good news is that the new hospital is trying to cure not just prolong. I think if they were just trying to prolong my father would 86 the treatment and just go for quality of life.

Tamalewagon said:

I'm going to agree with Bill...fuck cancer! The first Dr. misdiagnosed the cancer type and wasted 30 days. Instead of being fully involved in the treatment, Dad just started treatment yesterday and is currently between stage 3 and 4. Not the news I was hoping for but I have hope. The good news is that the new hospital is trying to cure not just prolong. I think if they were just trying to prolong my father would 86 the treatment and just go for quality of life.

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Sorry to hear about how advanced it is. . Happy to hear they are trying to cure though!

Sorry, Scott. Thinking about you guys.

More Prayers for you and your Father TW, hoping they cure him!

Sorry to read Scott, hope for the best for your pops........[emoji202]

Sent from my SM-G930V using Tapatalk

No need to beg for prayers, they are free and the easy part. Prayers that the Lord places his healing hands upon him.

Fast forward 7 months and the chemo treatment sadly, did not work. He is down to 117 pounds and may be giving up. The doctors are going to try Immune therapy as a last ditch effort. Not the best birthday news I was hoping for today.

Tamalewagon said:

Fast forward 7 months and the chemo treatment sadly, did not work. He is down to 117 pounds and may be giving up. The doctors are going to try Immune therapy as a last ditch effort. Not the best birthday news I was hoping for today.

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So sorry Scott.

Sorry to read this Scott, prayers for you and the family.

That sucks... Prayers for you all !

Our thoughts are with you and your family.

Sorry to read this TW, that is terrible news. Prayers and positive thoughts to your father and your family. Fingers crossed that the immune therapy works!

Happy Birthday man, share it with your family and father.

Yesterday I received the news I have been fearing since we learned of my fathers illness. There is no further hope. My courageous father fought a good battle and was given less than 3 months. I am so stunned by the news when my father called, I was speechless. How do you console a man who is faced with his own mortality?

So sorry to hear the news. This is the first I have seen the thread. So much high and low within it. Prayers go out to you and your family in these difficult time. I am moving into this phase of live and it is going to be difficult.

Tamalewagon said:

Yesterday I received the news I have been fearing since we learned of my fathers illness. There is no further hope. My courageous father fought a good battle and was given less than 3 months. I am so stunned by the news when my father called, I was speechless. How do you console a man who is faced with his own mortality?

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I think you spend the last 3 months with him. If he is able to get around a bit take him where he wants to go. Make sure he sees the things he wants to see. If he cant get around bring the stuff to him that interests him. I am really sorry to hear this. The good news is you still have time, it will never be enough but it is something.

Tamalewagon said:

Yesterday I received the news I have been fearing since we learned of my fathers illness. There is no further hope. My courageous father fought a good battle and was given less than 3 months. I am so stunned by the news when my father called, I was speechless. How do you console a man who is faced with his own mortality?

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Sorry to hear Scott. How old is your dad?
.
Hardest thing to watch transpire. My dad asked me something I had no answer for as he was in his final stages......essentially we all told him its ok to leave and be with mom, we love him, blah, blah.
His looks at me with that hollow stare and asks, "How do I do that?"
I about lost it.
All I can say is have as much quality time you can and talk about things with him you never imagined you would or could.....our parents wisdom never dies.

Dang, SUX to read this. More prayers for your Pops and family.
I would suggest that he start working on his Bucket list and checking things off while spending as much time together as possible.

My MIL is going through Chemo right now and has inop liver cancer. It's tough to see her go though it.
We have taken a few trips between sessions when she feels up to it. I keep encouraging her to do more.

Try to stay positive... crack a smile and a joke as much as possible, which helps take the stress off.
You still have time to make some great memories!!!

Ziggy said:

Sorry to hear Scott. How old is your dad?
.
Hardest thing to watch transpire. My dad asked me something I had no answer for as he was in his final stages......essentially we all told him its ok to leave and be with mom, we love him, blah, blah.
His looks at me with that hollow stare and asks, "How do I do that?"
I about lost it.
All I can say is have as much quality time you can and talk about things with him you never imagined you would or could.....our parents wisdom never dies.

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Thank you Zigmund. My father is 75. Much too young for this type of nonsense. Our trip to Sedona last October was our last hurrah. I took him and his wife to the best restaurants, got him the best wines etc. and we stayed up late every night reminiscing going back over life and what a great father/friend he has been to me. I just can't imagine not being able to pick up the phone to just "chat".

Tamalewagon said:

Thank you Zigmund. My father is 75. Much too young for this type of nonsense. Our trip to Sedona last October was our last hurrah. I took him and his wife to the best restaurants, got him the best wines etc. and we stayed up late every night reminiscing going back over life and what a great father/friend he has been to me. I just can't imagine not being able to pick up the phone to just "chat".

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Trust me, you will continue to chat with him, you will hear his answers. Your non-verbal skills will only been turned on at this stage in your life.
.
Is he still physically mobile?

Ziggy said:

Trust me, you will continue to chat with him, you will hear his answers. Your non-verbal skills will only been turned on at this stage in your life.
.
Is he still physically mobile?

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Yes he is still able to get around a little. The pain is overwhelming most of the time though.

Sorry to hear this. I would start by thanking him for being your father. Thank him for being such a good man and father and tell him that you are a better person and man because of him. Spend as much time as you can with him and be there for him every chance you get.
Savor every moment you have with him, good and bad. These will be the things that will help you be at ease later on.
Spend some time praying with him and maybe some Bible verses as this will help both of you!

Tamalewagon said:

Yes he is still able to get around a little. The pain is overwhelming most of the time though.

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You have had a year with your dad, and had the chance to "make your peace" with is eventual/inevitable passing. The last few months for my dad were agonizing pain for him that simply would not let up. He was doing morphene like they were tic-tacs. It was even more agonizing for me to watch him suffer and not being able to do anything about it. But I was grateful for the time we spent together. I was comforted by how proud he was of me, and the life I had made for myself.

It was in those last months that he began to talk to me of his time in WW2 and what he saw in the death camps in Nazi Germany, and the thousands of refugees from the communists. He was 19 when he was conscripted, and was 23 when the war was over. It was something he would never talk about to us kids, and would only do with his Army pals. I also got his unvarnished opinion of many of my family members, and the sordid details of their lives that as children we would never see or discuss.

At least when the time comes, you'll be ready and will have fond rememberances. I know that I was glad I made the time to spend with him no matter how hard it was to see a man so full of life be consumed by cancer.

Godspeed to him, and best wishes for you when he finally departs.

Cancer only took one year to take him. Capt. PA Wenhe's last flight west 11/21/18. Godspeed Dad.

Tamalewagon said:

Cancer only took one year to take him. Capt. PA Wenhe's last flight west 11/21/18. Godspeed Dad. View attachment 703802

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So sorry for your loss, RIP Capt.

So sorry for your loss..RIP............