How do you rid your life of toxicity?

[coolchange]

What have you done to eliminate the toxic elements of your life?
This past year I unintentionally went on a quest to eliminate toxic people and things from my life.
it started when I realized I'm just not going to put up with bulshit from other people anymore.
It started with a phone call to my family member about a spouse with aggravated texts to my wife. Told them I wasn't tolerating any more negativity. If they didn't want to be a positive, they wouldn't be anything. Then some more texts from in-laws regarding the situation they didn't like, but we're doing nothing to help. Sent them a text back and chopped them off at the knees.
That's when I realized I was on a mission!
I never had much issue with anxiety and stress. I now take care of my 92 year-old father. My wife quit her job to do this. Now she deals with her father also who is dealing with a debilitating disease.
She also had a meltdown with her family regards to her father and the impending issues of family trust.
This also means virtually no vacation time, or stress relief, due to responsibilities.
My New year's resolution, of which I don't usually participate in, is to look back on people and things, and evaluate if they bring positivity into my life.

 

[fmo24]

About all you can do is cut them off. My partner has not spoken to his father in 25 years and his mother drinks a bit much so just does not reply to her rants

 

[JD D05]

My family is great we rarely have any issues and even if we do it is over really fast. I have always had the ability to get over most anything really fast, like within an hour. My wife's side is also pretty good even though they all talk a ton of shit on each other and I am on sure me also, but I really don't care if they do. I am slow at letting people in but once or if they are "in" I have there back and let everything go because they are important to me. For those people that aren't I really don't care. This has a ton to do with your individual personality types.

 

[JD D05]

What have you done to eliminate the toxic elements of your life?
This past year I unintentionally went on a quest to eliminate toxic people and things from my life.
it started when I realized I'm just not going to put up with bulshit from other people anymore.
It started with a phone call to my family member about a spouse with aggravated texts to my wife. Told them I wasn't tolerating any more negativity. If they didn't want to be a positive, they wouldn't be anything. Then some more texts from in-laws regarding the situation they didn't like, but we're doing nothing to help. Sent them a text back and chopped them off at the knees.
That's when I realized I was on a mission!
I never had much issue with anxiety and stress. I now take care of my 92 year-old father. My wife quit her job to do this. Now she deals with her father also who is dealing with a debilitating disease.
She also had a meltdown with her family regards to her father and the impending issues of family trust.
This also means virtually no vacation time, or stress relief, due to responsibilities.
My New year's resolution, of which I don't usually participate in, is to look back on people and things, and evaluate if they bring positivity into my life.

You might mind this interesting and maybe learn something about yourself. If you have 10 min take the test and than read your results.

If you do it, do the classic version.

https://www.eclecticenergies.com/enneagram/dotest

 

[Spudsbud]

CC, Im a few years ahead of you on that road.
Youre on the right track. It works. Trust me. Keep it up. Yes its tough.
Life is too short to have negative people in your life.

 

[pixrthis]

Remember not to worry about things you have no control of and you have a choice of who’s in your life, family not excluded. Losing family can be hard but sometimes they’re not worth the crap they’re bring to the table. Good luck Bruce.

 

[pronstar]

Choose where you devote your energy to:

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro

 

[LargeOrangeFont]

Is this another thread about banning @GRADS ?

 

[monkeyswrench]

In my life, I have learned there are things you can somewhat control, and those that are far beyond your control. Nothing is completely within your control. If the bad vibes from family are a stressor, it is on you and those you live with. If you have friends that are drama, just the same. The best you can do is limit interaction with those aspects. Sometimes, that can be another issue. Make sure you and your wife/immediate family are in agreement on both the action and the reasons. That helps.

My thoughts on the things I cannot control... In the midst of the last economic downturn, I was hustling like hell, and selling off everything from my toys to my soul. I "knew" I could handle it all. The stress on my marriage was bad. My health was jacked, and yet I still "knew" I could handle it. In the middle of that mess, my Mom started going through her second fight with cancer. I still "knew" I could handle everything. My Mom passed on a Monday. That same Friday, upon returning from my Mom's service, I received a letter saying I was being laid off due to budget cuts.

As I looked through my tears at my wife, I couldn't help but laugh. "Well, this isn't the worst thing that happened this week."

At that moment, I realized I didn't "know" anything. I can't control the world surrounding me, but I may be able to guide things here and there. The best you can do is be the best you can. Be it for yourself and those you care about.

 

[Canuck 1]

When you cut off the leaches, the users, the whiners, the mooches, the toxic, and the useless and put your energy to what really matters, family or not life becomes good

 

[Skinny Tire AH]

What have you done to eliminate the toxic elements of your life?
This past year I unintentionally went on a quest to eliminate toxic people and things from my life.
it started when I realized I'm just not going to put up with bulshit from other people anymore.
It started with a phone call to my family member about a spouse with aggravated texts to my wife. Told them I wasn't tolerating any more negativity. If they didn't want to be a positive, they wouldn't be anything. Then some more texts from in-laws regarding the situation they didn't like, but we're doing nothing to help. Sent them a text back and chopped them off at the knees.
That's when I realized I was on a mission!
I never had much issue with anxiety and stress. I now take care of my 92 year-old father. My wife quit her job to do this. Now she deals with her father also who is dealing with a debilitating disease.
She also had a meltdown with her family regards to her father and the impending issues of family trust.
This also means virtually no vacation time, or stress relief, due to responsibilities.
My New year's resolution, of which I don't usually participate in, is to look back on people and things, and evaluate if they bring positivity into my life.

Agree!

I have gone one step further. I realized that many, MANY of my "acquaintances" never, ever initiate a text message. Those folks get the same result and treatment as your post.

 

[Mcob25rg]

Coming from a guy that cut off my narcissistic father for the last 4 year of his life (age 46-50), i realized that the only person that can control my internal happiness is me. I refuse to be around negative, mean people regardless of their relationship to me - family/customer/vendor/aquaintance. I constantly self talk to myself about being grateful for what i do have and not judging others, and try and spend my life doing the right thing for me, not pleasing the rest of the world. I don't always succeed, but that's the goal = stay away from negativity at ALL cost. I'm trying to be impressed by people that live like i try to, without reguard to station in life - they're out there if you know what you're looking for

 

[was thatguy]

Easy. I keep an ocean and 2000 miles MINIMUM between me and my immediate family...as they are, historically, the most toxic influence in my life.
When my brother died I hadn’t spoken to him in about 7 years. Dad was my point of contact, I was there at his deathbed and he told me do NOT let my brother or sister in the house.
It’s real easy to be a self centered ass when everyone in your life are fucking degenerate scammers.

Shut them out, choose better friends, family don’t mean shit.

 

[beaverretriever]

I am so happy every day and my outlook is just so positive. I rarely if ever have a bad day.

Are you ready? Here is my keys to no toxic crap in my life.

1. Stay off Facebook and make white cat memes.

 

[Deja_Vu]

The usual ...
Change phone number
Block them on social media


If you don’t want to change your number, don’t return any calls or texts and let your VM fill up lol

 

[RiverDave]

What have you done to eliminate the toxic elements of your life?
This past year I unintentionally went on a quest to eliminate toxic people and things from my life.
it started when I realized I'm just not going to put up with bulshit from other people anymore.
It started with a phone call to my family member about a spouse with aggravated texts to my wife. Told them I wasn't tolerating any more negativity. If they didn't want to be a positive, they wouldn't be anything. Then some more texts from in-laws regarding the situation they didn't like, but we're doing nothing to help. Sent them a text back and chopped them off at the knees.
That's when I realized I was on a mission!
I never had much issue with anxiety and stress. I now take care of my 92 year-old father. My wife quit her job to do this. Now she deals with her father also who is dealing with a debilitating disease.
She also had a meltdown with her family regards to her father and the impending issues of family trust.
This also means virtually no vacation time, or stress relief, due to responsibilities.
My New year's resolution, of which I don't usually participate in, is to look back on people and things, and evaluate if they bring positivity into my life.

This is something I started doing after I got hurt.. Life is hard enough without dealing with these negative wankers on top of it.

That and the fucking weirdos that I have always tolerated.. Everyone of them is one bizarre social moment away from hitting the road. Lol

 

[monkeyswrench]

This is something I started doing after I got hurt.. Life is hard enough without dealing with these negative wankers on top of it.

That and the fucking weirdos that I have always tolerated.. Everyone of them is one bizarre social moment away from hitting the road. Lol

"Negative Wankers"...you smoking a fag and drinking your beer by the pint...at room temp?


As for the weirdos you tolerate...you literaly built and named the venue for suck fucktardery

...and most of us fucktards appreciate it!

 

[Bullet28]

I’m going through this now with my son and daughter in law, very bad situation and my grandsons are 11 and 9.

 

[Jojo1]

What have you done to eliminate the toxic elements of your life?
This past year I unintentionally went on a quest to eliminate toxic people and things from my life.
it started when I realized I'm just not going to put up with bulshit from other people anymore.
It started with a phone call to my family member about a spouse with aggravated texts to my wife. Told them I wasn't tolerating any more negativity. If they didn't want to be a positive, they wouldn't be anything. Then some more texts from in-laws regarding the situation they didn't like, but we're doing nothing to help. Sent them a text back and chopped them off at the knees.
That's when I realized I was on a mission!
I never had much issue with anxiety and stress. I now take care of my 92 year-old father. My wife quit her job to do this. Now she deals with her father also who is dealing with a debilitating disease.
She also had a meltdown with her family regards to her father and the impending issues of family trust.
This also means virtually no vacation time, or stress relief, due to responsibilities.
My New year's resolution, of which I don't usually participate in, is to look back on people and things, and evaluate if they bring positivity into my life.

What have you done to eliminate the toxic elements of your life?
This past year I unintentionally went on a quest to eliminate toxic people and things from my life.
it started when I realized I'm just not going to put up with bulshit from other people anymore.
It started with a phone call to my family member about a spouse with aggravated texts to my wife. Told them I wasn't tolerating any more negativity. If they didn't want to be a positive, they wouldn't be anything. Then some more texts from in-laws regarding the situation they didn't like, but we're doing nothing to help. Sent them a text back and chopped them off at the knees.
That's when I realized I was on a mission!
I never had much issue with anxiety and stress. I now take care of my 92 year-old father. My wife quit her job to do this. Now she deals with her father also who is dealing with a debilitating disease.
She also had a meltdown with her family regards to her father and the impending issues of family trust.
This also means virtually no vacation time, or stress relief, due to responsibilities.
My New year's resolution, of which I don't usually participate in, is to look back on people and things, and evaluate if they bring positivity into my life.

I would stay sober. I would also get rid of friends that don't agree. Or, maybe they aren't friends.

 

[Happy Smitty]

To rid my life of toxicity I start by ridding my body of toxicity. This occurs every Saturday and sunday, in the early morning. In the later morning I then apologize to everyone I was around the prevoius night.

So far it's been working well for me.

 

[TCHB]

Some of my worst hires were negative people that would blame everything on others. . My best hires were positive people that were fun to work with that could solve complex issues. Now I really try to stay away from negative people. Life is too short.

 

[HOOTER SLED-]

Bwahahahahaaa... I just fucking dont talk to anybody anymore. Dont let drama in.

 

[Yellowboat]

I got lucky, they died of thier own making. The ones still left alive i dont have cpntact with. If there is an emergency they can call me, i wont pick up, but if they leave a message i will listen to it( well at least thr 1st couple seconds to see if it is an emergency)

You can pnly pick one person in your family( spouse so pick your friends and get rid of the toxic ones.

 

[HST4ME]

Turned off the tv oh ,12-13 years ago?

"The TV lies...and pacifies."

 

[Sleek-Jet]

More fiber in my diet.

 

[Dan Lorenze]

I’m going through this now with my son and daughter in law, very bad situation and my grandsons are 11 and 9.

My brother is so hard on my Dad and my stepmom for whatever reason, but my parents love their grandkids so much they will put up with whatever just to see them.

 

[Dan Lorenze]

What have you done to eliminate the toxic elements of your life?

I got divorced. As sad as it was at the time, it single handedly changed my life for the better. It was so toxic for me, I'm embarrassed that i put up with so much for so long. It was like being jailed for years and then set free to go on a permanent vacation, and now I can live out my life the way I want.

 

[Ziggy]

Turned off the tv oh ,12-13 years ago?

"The TV lies...and pacifies."

The fuking news station are ridiculous, first half hour is chalked full of negative stories, then you get asinine sports followed by weather by a beautiful woman reading a teleprompter that likely has no real clue about meteorology.
Even my wife says it stresses her to point of not being able to sleep if she watches it.
I honestly haven't watched news in several years, thankfully.

 

[Ziggy]

Oh, and if there's any noteworthy news it'll get posted here

 

[RodnJen]

I limit my time/exposure to people that are toxic, or I plain just don’t like. Or simply, I don’t socialize with assholes.

 

[HST4ME]

The fuking news station are ridiculous, first half hour is chalked full of negative stories, then you get asinine sports followed by weather by a beautiful woman reading a teleprompter that likely has no real clue about meteorology.
Even my wife says it stresses her to point of not being able to sleep if she watches it.
I honestly haven't watched news in several years, thankfully.

Turn that piece of shit off..there are better things to do.

 

[Ziggy]

Turn that piece of shit off..there are better things to do.

I watch things I like or learn stuff from, nothing that tries to tell me what or how to think.

 

[Rajobigguy]

Some of my worst hires were negative people that would blame everything on others. . My best hires were positive people that were fun to work with that could solve complex issues. Now I really try to stay away from negative people. Life is too short.

Larry Lemon. You and I are probably the only ones on this board that will understand.

 

[brownsuger]

The fuking news station are ridiculous, first half hour is chalked full of negative stories, then you get asinine sports followed by weather by a beautiful woman reading a teleprompter that likely has no real clue about meteorology.
Even my wife says it stresses her to point of not being able to sleep if she watches it.
I honestly haven't watched news in several years, thankfully.

I used to watch the news before work in the morning... and I agree what a joke... Then I would only watch the weather., just as bad....Now I don't watch the news at all and get the weather on my phone....

 

[brownsuger]

Some of my worst hires were negative people that would blame everything on others. . My best hires were positive people that were fun to work with that could solve complex issues. Now I really try to stay away from negative people. Life is too short.

I get rid of "excuse people" at my shop pretty quickly. We're a small shop and it's amazing how 1 bad attitude brings down everyone....

 

[Taboma]

I limit my time/exposure to people that are toxic, or I plain just don’t like. Or simply, I don’t socialize with assholes.

And yet you're constantly socializing in the P&G section spreading your liberal toxicity. Interesting Well, at least there's no assholes there, lol

 

[coolchange]

More fiber , I'll have to try that!
I think when my wife gets back we aare having a sit down.
She tries to keep everybody happy and is very forgiving. (Maybe that's why we've been married so long LOL).
I don't watch the body-count, Trump parade, except to get traffic reports in the morning. Amazing what an effect that can have on you.
Too bad it's winter. Amazing what a"f****** I'm going to the river"trip can have on your outlook.

 

[Old Texan]

I got divorced. As sad as it was at the time, it single handedly changed my life for the better. It was so toxic for me, I'm embarrassed that i put up with so much for so long. It was like being jailed for years and then set free to go on a permanent vacation, and now I can live out my life the way I want.

A lifelong friend got his divorce from a 20+ year marriage to a bi-polar loon he had tolerated all those years. He visited us afterwards and broke down as he told the sad and crazy life he'd led with her. It was so hard top believe what the guy had endured trying to keep the peace and for his kids.....Bad things happen to good people is the best way to put it. Good people that try and do right.

Happy that you were able to break away and enjoy the good life you deserve as my buddy did.

 

[monkeyswrench]

More fiber , I'll have to try that!
I think when my wife gets back we aare having a sit down.
She tries to keep everybody happy and is very forgiving. (Maybe that's why we've been married so long LOL).
I don't watch the body-count, Trump parade, except to get traffic reports in the morning. Amazing what an effect that can have on you.
Too bad it's winter. Amazing what a"f****** I'm going to the river"trip can have on your outlook.

That last part, about changing your outlook... With you and your wife caring for ailing parents, it can be tough. The having to be close by, just in case. That, and the stress that is there, adds to the stuff you can't really control. If you're a good person, you care. It sucks, as I wasn't always a good person...still debateable at times now. If you can't hit the bricks, and leave town for a few days, do little stuff. Pickup, make or go out for dinner. Movie nights...just break the cycle a bit. As for yourself, and your own well being, that's a bit different. Since my accident, I don't sleep much. The accident took place before life got really crappy, with finances and family health. Sleep got to be rare. I spent time in the garage, building cars for other people. I'm not saying you should do that. What worked for me was seeing progress on something I was doing. It made me feel like I was accomplishing something, even though my wheels were spinning in every other aspect. It was just kind of a glimmer on the horizon, but it help clear my head.

 

[RodnJen]

And yet you're constantly socializing in the P&G section spreading your liberal toxicity. Interesting Well, at least there's no assholes there, lol

Because there are some smart people down there. Some, not all.

 

[pronstar]

If you’re into books/audiobooks, this one is amazing[emoji106]

It shows how to get into various states of mind, including how to become “un-fuck-with-able”.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro

 

[Bigbore500r]

I need to do this. I spend alot of energy helping people who only call when they need help (literally....) , I know they're using me as their safety net, but I do it because I like to please and be helpful. I'm too nice. Drives my wife nuts. Now my wife....she'll cut you off cold right away, no problem. She's ruthless

 

[Taboma]

Because there are some smart people down there. Some, not all.

I certainly can't argue with that, regardless of one's political leaning. As easy as it is to identify the potential, it's frustrating when so much potential is wasted on posturing and defensiveness.
That place is a sociologists and psychologists wet dream. I've wondered just how many students of either have tailored their master's thesis using the RDP P&G section as their study group

 

[Activated]

Bourbon.

 

[Taboma]

I need to do this. I spend alot of energy helping people who only call when they need help (literally....) , I know they're using me as their safety net, but I do it because I like to please and be helpful. I'm too nice. Drives my wife nuts. Now my wife....she'll cut you off cold right away, no problem. She's ruthless

Funny, sounds like my wife, yet 99% of the people who've met her would consider her one the most sweet, upbeat and positive person's they know and brand ME the meany.
That's true and well deserved, but woe be unto you if you should cross her ' Line in the sand ' by considering her sweetness as a weakness. Actually one of her traits I sincerely admire and respect her for and has served her well in her business environment.

 

[RiverDave]

If you’re into books/audiobooks, this one is amazing[emoji106]

It shows how to get into various states of mind, including how to become “un-fuck-with-able”.

View attachment 824732


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Pro

I can fuck with anybody.. I don’t care what stare of mind their in.. Its one of my natural talents. Lol

 

[ChiliPepperGarage]

I moved out of CA!

 

[LazyLavey]

More fiber , I'll have to try that!
I think when my wife gets back we aare having a sit down.
She tries to keep everybody happy and is very forgiving. (Maybe that's why we've been married so long LOL).
I don't watch the body-count, Trump parade, except to get traffic reports in the morning. Amazing what an effect that can have on you.
Too bad it's winter. Amazing what a"f****** I'm going to the river"trip can have on your outlook.

I started listening to classical music and zone out on my drive home from the job.... I'd try anything (legal) to lower the everyday BS..