Adult things not to do

[The Prisoner]

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120 hours vacation for me............I make my own smoothies.

 

[Happy Smitty]

Well I’m 32 and I just shit my pants at work....

Congratulations! Sounds like your first time. Dont worry there will be plenty more of the awkward events. Such as shart the seat of your truck, your friends couch, and in your neighbors pool. Good luck and always keep a pack of flushable wipes and extra underwear nearby.

 

[brgrcru]

I don't even fart and seems like I'm still cleaning up an hour, after I took a shit. Fuck getting old sucks .

 

[lebel409]

The drummer in our band was on his way home to Victorville after a long night. Going up the hill he felt the urge and clenched it back. He felt he'd make it home...he did, drove into his garage, put it in park and blew brown all over his Honda.

 

[coolchange]

To this day, from my construction days, large Ziploc bag, dry socks, underwear, t-shirt, toilet paper in the truck always.

 

[jetboatperformance]

Interesting subject matter but ... this is River Daves Place where very little is taboo.. Older than most of you however I have often said "Metamucil changed my life" 10+ years ago I started with this wonder drug daily and never looked back

 

[Sherpa]

My belief is nothing gets you faster to hot-snakes and bubble gut than mongolian barbeque.................

--Sherpa

 

[FreeBird236]

I've got a couple stories that I won't bore you with, but nowadays I just watch out for sugar free products, it can create close calls.

 

[DaveC]

No one uses questionable ethnic food if they are a bit backed up?

 

[pronstar]

No one uses questionable ethnic food if they are a bit backed up?

Sometimes the nuclear option is the only option [emoji4][emoji90]


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[rrrr]

I've got a couple stories that I won't bore you with, but nowadays I just watch out for sugar free products, it can create close calls.

Who remembers potato chips made with Olestra, an artificial fat? That stuff was a guarantee you would be clenching and walking fast.

 

[pronstar]

Who remembers potato chips made with Olestra, an artificial fat? That stuff was a guarantee you would be clenching and walking fast.

A product infamous for bringing “anal leakage” to the forefront [emoji106][emoji90][emoji107]


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[ElAzul]

Haribo Sugar Free gummy bears...the Amazon reviews are as epic as China Buffet

 

[DB / HAV]

I learned the hard way...after drinking that colonoscopy stuff- never try to hold back a sneeze!

 

[Rondog4405]

Happens to the best of us.....

 

[Chili Palmer]

Nothing quite so eye opening as a fart with a "lump" in it....

UD

You can hold back the lumps, it’s the stealthy juice that the lumps travel in that can change a humorous fart to an immediate attention alert and your face will give it away every time.

 

[AZMIDLYF]

 

[Chili Palmer]

 

[24 Sleekenforcer]

This is a shitty thread.

 

[AZMIDLYF]

 

[Boat hauler Doug]

Hope you don't put your fingers thru the toilet paper

 

[Boat hauler Doug]

Hope you don't put your fingers thru the toilet paper

 

[4Waters]

Hope you don't put your fingers thru the toilet paper

This isn't a thread about "Gettin a piece of ass"

 

[Boat hauler Doug]

K4waters last time I saw you were floating down the stream ass fill of gravel your p__'y fill of cream your tits hang down like a shot house bucket and you want to be my friend

 

[4Waters]

K4waters last time I saw you were floating down the stream ass fill of gravel your p__'y fill of cream your tits hang down like a shot house bucket and you want to be my friend

What?

 

[Boat hauler Doug]

4Waters just clowning around

 

[RiverDave]

Who remembers potato chips made with Olestra, an artificial fat? That stuff was a guarantee you would be clenching and walking fast.

They actually had a warning on the chips that said “may cause anal leakage” in the fine print.. lol. Who comes up with this shit?

 

[RiverDave]

On a serious note on Friday I was at the boatshow explaining what rdp was to some guy and I started LMAO. The first thread I opened was this one.

 

[4Waters]

Frank Kramer on KLOS admitted this morning that he shit his pants this weekend. LOL

 

[Riverryder]

On a serious note on Friday I was at the boatshow explaining what rdp was to some guy and I started LMAO. The first thread I opened was this one.

What is rdp?


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[was thatguy]

I will (and have) shit myself before I’ll shit on my own time...

 

[welldigger00]

I’ve got to admit, it’s actually kind of poetic the way the OP titles this thread, and the first line that he wrote. I looked at it again after Dave said that he showed it to a stranger, and I think it’s even funnier now!


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[buck35]

What is rdp?


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Really damp pants.....

 

[4Waters]

On a serious note on Friday I was at the boatshow explaining what rdp was to some guy and I started LMAO. The first thread I opened was this one.

So did he join or run away

 

[92 cole]

true story. when I was doing demolition I had an operator on a loader that wore work boots of course. Always wore 2 pair of socks. you figure what the second pair was for. I was on the the excavator piling debri for him to load the trucks I ordered. I also stopped many times to see him tip his bucket to shield his own dump spot. Of course we all were eating of the roach-couch. Revenge sucks.

 

[92 cole]

Also try being a class A truck driver when sh$t happens. I have needed to cop a squat between the trailer and cab a few times. I to this day carry a roll of ass-wipe in my pick-up, Never no when sh$t happens. Better to be prepared than not!!!

 

[nowski]

Hope you don't put your fingers thru the toilet paper

But if you do you'll be singing this song...