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endobear

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Such a crazy deal.
My wife's hot.. super smart and on her game.. she kills it at her job and any job you give her.. she never used her looks to get ahead , but she should have.. Her new boss is awesome.
Loves my family.
Guilt maybe?? Looking back..
My kids write her and her husband holiday cards, they exchange gifts and have treated us very well.. I'm sure her husband never new anything and is giving her so much shit right now.
 

LargeOrangeFont

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Best advice IMO. Personally, I’d start looking for another place to work. It’s easier to find a job when you have one. The idea of getting even with a lawsuit is pretty appealing but unless you can prove it cost job opportunities or there was a quid pro quo, i doubt the payoff would be worth it.

Agreed. I don’t see a lawsuit having much legs.
 
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Gelcoater

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think it through . . . . then think it through . . . . take some time and re-think it through . . . . then take more time, cool down and re-think it through again . . . only talk to people about it w/ their heads screwed on straight . . . DO NOT tell friends, etc. . . . . my last gal had a major fuck-up go down w/ a national publicly traded company . . . . . . try to separate the 'personal' feelings and look CLOSELY at the facts . . . . TRUST ME.
In other words.
Don’t post it on RiverDaves Place😎
 

HTTP404

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You never know. She might be trying to get ahead of some news that might be coming out.
 

DWC

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Agreed. I don’t see a lawsuit having much legs.
There was a time where large companies paid out on these. It could be just my workplace, but doesn’t happen as much. Now, if ia big deal is brought up someone gets got and a mew dealer steps up to the table.
 

DWC

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This is why I dont drink with coworkers, clients vendors or eat dinner etc etc. etc.

A few drinks, and here comes all the bullshit! Happens all the time!

Id rather be called the "unsocial one".
Great advice sir. I dodged a few bullets early in my career. Oh shit how things could have went wrong. Things are different now, whether it’s a dozen people from my team or thousands at a yearly meeting i cut out early. Bring my wife to both.. Have dinner, a couple of cold ones and politely check out. (Ok, sometimes after a few instead of a couple but still before shit gets ugly). Save the partying for Havasu and friends.
 

2FORCEFULL

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Wife was at a work dinner last night and was speaking with a vendor she's been working with on and off for 16 years. It came up how happy he was that she was working with them again. It came up that she thought his group didn't like her. He then proceeded to tell her that they had all thought she was sleeping with her boss (district manager for a large bank) 15 years ago.
Wife was floored and this dude was back peddling like crazy. He called out the lady who told him right at dinner. My wife has known this lady for 16 years and as of 4 years ago is her direct report and very close friend. Or so she thought.

Wife's super embarrassed, hurt and livid.
It's been a tough 16 years with the bank and she's been passed up for numerous promotions, has dealt with many bitchy women coworkers and feels this rumor tainted her career .

She's ready to quit . Almost jumped on a plane last night. I told her to stick out the trip and see what her boss has to say for herself.
Does she quit? Ask for a transfer? Or just accept her bosses apology and accept it was something that happened over a decade ago and move on.
this is an easy fix,.... mostly because there is nothing to fix,,... your post say's all the co workers thought she was banging the boss... your wife is the one that needs to go to her new boss and clear the story.... some thing like" man, I just found out everybody at so N so thinks I was banging the boss.... just to set the story straight... it never happened..."... bet that handles it...
 

endobear

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Great advice sir. I dodged a few bullets early in my career. Oh shit how things could have went wrong. Things are different now, whether it’s a dozen people from my team or thousands at a yearly meeting i cut out early. Bring my wife to both.. Have dinner, a couple of cold ones and politely check out. (Ok, sometimes after a few instead of a couple but still before shit gets ugly). Save the partying for Havasu and friends.
So my wife doesn't really drink. For sure not at work..Her job is marketing. Be friendly, make sure every one is happy. If you need something she makes it happen.
 
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LargeOrangeFont

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There was a time where large companies paid out on these. It could be just my workplace, but doesn’t happen as much. Now, if ia big deal is brought up someone gets got and a mew dealer steps up to the table.

Yep. This is she said, she said. Unless there is a email a memo, a statement, something... it’s nothing.
 
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LargeOrangeFont

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Great advice sir. I dodged a few bullets early in my career. Oh shit how things could have went wrong. Things are different now, whether it’s a dozen people from my team or thousands at a yearly meeting i cut out early. Bring my wife to both.. Have dinner, a couple of cold ones and politely check out. (Ok, sometimes after a few instead of a couple but still before shit gets ugly). Save the partying for Havasu and friends.

My job sometimes involves drinking and entertaining clients, less of that lately, but it’s a fine line. Not a ton of women in my field so that helps. As the drinking starts, my smiling and nodding increases.... become forgettable as the partying Ramps up. No direct eye contact with women.
 
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DWC

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So my wife doesn't really drink. For sure not at work..Her job is marketing. Be friendly, make sure every one is happy. If you need something she makes it happen.
Understood and wasn’t pulling your wife into it at all. Purely advice for the younger crowd. Advice i never got.
PS. Please take it easy on the short, bald guys. It’s genetics man. :oops:
PPS. I’ve been through a lot of bosses. Some good, some suck. My goal is to outlast the M’frs. Karma is a bitch and they all end up needing something in the end.
 

Gelcoater

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So my wife doesn't really drink. For sure not at work..Her job is marketing. Be friendly, make sure every one is happy. If you need something she makes it happen.
She’s driven our drunken asses home a couple times😂
 
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LargeOrangeFont

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Understood and wasn’t pulling your wife into it at all. Purely advice for the younger crowd. Advice i never got.
PS. Please take it easy on the short, bald guys. It’s genetics man. :oops:
PPS. I’ve been through a lot of bosses. Some good, some suck. My goal is to outlast the M’frs. Karma is a bitch and they all end up needing something in the end.

I got the advice from Tom Leykis lol. Don’t ever talk to woman in the workplace about anything other than work. Don’t talk to women you work with out of the workplace at all. Nothing good comes of it.
 

Gelcoater

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Understood and wasn’t pulling your wife into it at all. Purely advice for the younger crowd. Advice i never got.
PS. Please take it easy on the short, bald guys. It’s genetics man. :oops:
PPS. I’ve been through a lot of bosses. Some good, some suck. My goal is to outlast the M’frs. Karma is a bitch and they all end up needing something in the end.
You’re not that short😇😂
 
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Melloyellovector

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So my wife doesn't really drink. For sure not at work..Her job is marketing. Be friendly, make sure every one is happy. If you need something she makes it happen.
Did her old 40yo midget boss need something ? Lmao, jk, kinda lol

If her new boss is the one that made statement many years ago. Is now her bff and best time she’s had working last 4 years or what ever it’s been. Then leave it alone. The past is the past. If it’s a rumor or truth it’s history at this point. If new boss got thrown under the buss already at dinner it’s already on the table. Laugh and say no I didn’t and move on. Happy work life continues. Cause waves in a Corp world she will end up in a shit position or forced into a position ( like she’s had happen 15 years ago, lol, :D kidding ) to be let go.
 

endobear

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Fucked up part of this entire deal. I probably would have ended up in jail 15 years ago if I heard this shit.
 

WTR&PWR

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Yeah, I thought about this. THANKS. . But its pretty doubtfull she was banging a late 40s bald midget in her 20s. Now if he was half as good looking aa me I would be worried.
Now they’re gonna want a picture of you! Haha

Good luck to you and the wife. Shitty deal.
 

endobear

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Did her old 40yo midget boss need something ? Lmao, jk, kinda lol

If her new boss is the one that made statement many years ago. Is now her bff and best time she’s had working last 4 years or what ever it’s been. Then leave it alone. The past is the past. If it’s a rumor or truth it’s history at this point. If new boss got thrown under the buss already at dinner it’s already on the table. Laugh and say no I didn’t and move on. Happy work life continues. Cause waves in a Corp world she will end up in a shit position or forced into a position ( like she’s had happen 15 years ago, lol, :D kidding ) to be let go.

Totally agree
 

endobear

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My wife totally gave this company 200%.
To think they alll thought she was Banging the boss has got to be horrible for her.
 

WhatExit?

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Sounds like the wife and husband need to lawyer up. Just in case 😁
 

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Yeah, I thought about this. THANKS. . But its pretty doubtfull she was banging a late 40s bald midget in her 20s. Now if he was half as good looking aa me I would be worried.
I stopped trying to figure out why women did what they did.
Enter: the hot teachers that sleep with high school boys, female CO that bang prison trash, congresswomen that engage with their female staff….etc etc etc
 
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arch stanton

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image.png.4045ace39f6cf9acb11915825f042102.png
 

endobear

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Fuck. I'm doubtfull she was fucking him. Could have been idk. Doubtful though.
 

endobear

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So .many things that went down in our past that were off.
Now it's all making more sense.
 

hallett21

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Jesus really?


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DLC

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i would seek legal advice it would be worth $3-500 to see what a GOOD attorney has to say.

so a vender calls it out and says her current boss told him! If it goes down her current boss will get canned and possibly a new vendor will be contracted with but at the least an investigation / inquiry will have to be made…..

the problem for your wife is the banking community is fairly small, people know people and word gets out… recovering from the investigation/ inquiry will be difficult because it will be fresh and center on a lot if people’s mind.

the banking industry is a mans world ( good ol boy network ) and women have to adapt to fit in, usually have to do twice the work and be on point at all times and get paid less….

That sucks! It’s one hell of a story and I would need to talk to her current boss outside of work to get the full scoop in order to move on!
Biggest question would be Why?
 

COCA COLA COWBOY

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I would have her speak to an attorney, but also seek out a job where her talents will be seen and addressed.
 

CarolynandBob

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I got the advice from Tom Leykis lol. Don’t ever talk to woman in the workplace about anything other than work. Don’t talk to women you work with out of the workplace at all. Nothing good comes of it.

This!!. I would always have our female HR person in the room whenever I was talking to a female employee. Especially, at interviews. After the interviewing process I would ask her which one we should hire. I hired which ever one she said. Always worked out.

It sucks that you have to do that, but these days the risks of not doing it sucks. On a side note it was the same with carpooling the kids. Had a girl that was in the car pool. Lived about a mile from us. When taking the kids home my son would ask to be dropped off at home first, so he could get ready for baseball practice. Nope, never going to be alone with a 15/16 year old girl. When my son was sick and couldn't go to school I would have the wife do the carpool.
 

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This is actually pretty common. 2 people lost their jobs at my wife’s store recently for starting the same kinds of rumors.
 

HBCraig

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Fucked up part of this entire deal. I probably would have ended up in jail 15 years ago if I heard this shit.
Don't do that either. Honestly, talk to an attorney and tell them what exactly happened and what was said. They need to know the who all was saying this like a manager, a VP, a CEO, etc , you get the point

I don't like dealing with shit this way but on the outside looking in, you should do this sooner than later. If something happens and THEN you talk to an attorney this entire narrative changes a bit.
 

wishiknew

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Yeah, I thought about this. THANKS. . But its pretty doubtfull she was banging a late 40s bald midget in her 20s. Now if he was half as good looking aa me I would be worried.
It's always the least expected
 

mbrown2

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Does she want to keep the job in its current form? Seeing these things happen in the past... Normally HR is going to try and protect the company from a lawsuit so as soon as it is reported they will likely try and get the vendor on record and interview the current manager who shared the rumor. As soon as this process starts her relationship will be different with the current boss. It may not change bonus's/progression due to retaliation policies but any way you slice it they may change her boss, fire her boss, or end up splitting them up and possibly open themselves for further litigation. Sounds like she feels this is not a good environment.... Based on that she needs to protect herself. Sounds like a immature peer long ago made a critical mistake in starting a rumor about her that may/may not impacted her career progression. Proving that is gonna be tough as I am sure the current manager is going to flat out deny....someone else will have to come out of the ether and support the rumor existed and who started or implicate the new boss.

I recommend she saves anything she has in writing....if she talks to HR she gets everything in writing....In parallel I would talk to an attorney......She will need to show where she tried to get promoted or well she was passed up for promos, bonus's, raises, ect..

My thoughts at this point is since the vendor knows she now knows...somehow this is going to get back to that new boss....she should talk to HR before someone else does first. That is likely company policy and she needs to follow company policy. Not reporting it lessens her case.
 

Get415

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All this good advice but what does wife want to do about it? Let it go, talk to HR, see an attorney? That answer could ease your mind a little about any doubts you may have of her past activities. It's a shitty deal for you to have on your plate either way but I certainly wish you the best!
 

Done-it-again

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I'm not understanding of getting a lawyer? Because of a rumor?
 

Spudsbud

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but, 16 years ago ?? statute of limitations for any legal action ???
Surely some kind of detrimental Slander tho....
 

Dalton

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Something I’ve noticed working in large companies, there’s rumors all the time, a while back there was a certain rumor, but it actually got a big rise out of a couple people, even though it was a pretty run of the mill rumor, turned out to be more than a rumor.


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