Company Performance Appraisals

[Warlock1]

Hey Folks

Establishing a management program at work and I need to implement a performance evaluation process.

Would ya'll send me a workable sample of what you use?

Thanks

 

[Xtrmwakeboarder]

All I can say is make it simple. Below standards, At Standards, and Above Standards for your metrics. My last company had like 10 levels for 30 questions. Pain in the ass and pointless

 

[Blackmagic94]

Either you are doing your job or you are not.

 

[CJ_Donahue]

Agreed on keep it simple. We use 1-5 and "Standard" as the base. We have a "Merit Pay" raise for an average above 4 out the 10 evaluation categories. Do not use average as then for every above you need a below.

 

[LargeOrangeFont]

Are you basing merits on the performance ratings?

 

[farmo83]

We have 1,2,3.

1 is great, don't be a 3.

 

[LuauLounge]

Good comments to add to the review

1. “Since my last report, this employee has reached rock-bottom and has started to dig.”

2. “I would not allow this employee to breed.”

3. “This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definite won’t be.”

4. “Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap.”

5. “When she opens her mouth, it seems that it is only to change feet.”

6. “This young lady has delusions of adequacy.”

7. “He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.”

8. “This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.”

9. “This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts, the better.”

10. “Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thing to hold it all together.”

11. “A gross ignoramus — 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus.”

12. “He doesn’t have ulcers, but he’s a carrier.”

15. “He’s been working with glue too much.”

16. “He would argue with a signpost.”

17. “He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room.”

18. “When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell.”

19. “If you see two people talking and one looks bored, he’s the other one.”

20. “A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on.”

21. “A prime candidate for natural de-selection.”

22. “Donated his brain to science before he was done using it.”

23. “Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn’t coming.”

24. “He’s got two brains cells, one is lost and the other is out looking for it.”

25. “If he were any more stupid, he’d have to be watered twice a week.”

26. “If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you’d get change.”

27. “If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean.”

28. “It’s hard to believe he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm.”

29. “One neuron short of a synapse.”

30. “Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled.”

31. “Takes him 2 hours to watch ’60 Minutes’.”

32. “The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead.”

 

[Universal Elements]

Hey Folks

Establishing a management program at work and I need to implement a performance evaluation process.

Would ya'll send me a workable sample of what you use?

Thanks

If it’s in California, make sure and have a Performance Improvement Program for the employee that gets a substandard evaluation. Lots of documentation, progression sessions and etc. I’ve seen several employees walk off with substantial amount of $$$$$ due to failure of the company implementing this. Lawyers are very eager to tackle these cases. Could be a Pandora’s box.

 

[rivermobster]

When I worked for a big company I'll let go in named...

There were about ten different "areas" on the form and we're to be ranked on a 1 to 10 scale.

I was never allowed to give anyone a 10, cause "there is always room for improvement".

I did it anyway once or twice. Some people just deserved it.

I wouldn't make it too simple, or people won't take it seriously.

 

[RiverDave]

I am so far removed from corporate America anymore..

Last “normal” job I had you either got raises or you got fired. Lol