WELCOME TO RIVER DAVES PLACE

Parents/Kids and Movies--what are your limits?

Bear Down

Well-Known Member
Joined
Feb 19, 2011
Messages
653
Reaction score
954
I was born in '75 and really was never sheltered from any type of movies back in the days. I remember vividly drive-in movies with my siblings watching Halloween, Friday the 13th and such... seemed like every movie in the early 80's had some naked chick or sex scene in it or some horrific way of being slaughtered...I grew up just fine. Now having kids, I try to not shelter them as well, with either music or movies. Our family movie is Step Brothers...kids have been watching it since they have been 6... My 6 year old daughter loves Full metal Jacket. Obviously certain scenes you have to fast forward at those young ages, but newer movies have more eloquent language than in the 80's and 90s... so its been somewhat of a struggle for me to watch those type of movies when you hear some colorful sexual language. Also, listening to Classic NWA with my 11 Year old was kinda cool for a minute... Until some language caused it to become somewhat a little uncomfortable...especially when Too short came on and we started listening to freaky tales and life is too short.. So the question is, what are your limits on watching movies with your kids? there are some great movie classics I'd love to watch and watch with my kids eventually...but now I am struggling when it can go from exposing our youth to great movie classics to Creepo Parent..
 

propcheck

Well-Known Member
Joined
Nov 29, 2010
Messages
790
Reaction score
1,569
My wife and I raised the kids on Veggie Tales and blues clues. It is not easy to monitor the garbage that gets put into the kids these days but now that they are adults, in college, no drugs, no babies, working and saving im cool with the censoring decisions we made when they are young. As for hangin with the kids listening to inappropriate music, hard pass on that.
 

DLow

Single Barrel Dweller
Joined
Jun 28, 2012
Messages
3,046
Reaction score
3,635
I was also born in 75. We censor our kids movies and music much more than my parents did, and apparently much more than you do. That’s perfectly ok. My oldest is 13. She’s growing up fast and I am exposing her to much more adult stuff now. We figure that until now, we’d rather let our kids have as innocent as possible upbringing until they were individually able to handle the real world. It is child dependent though and you have to raise your kids how you feel is right. NWA... I’m out. I’m not going to play music with my kids that uses language I have repeatedly told them is never to be used. Sure, they may listen to it on their own as they get older. But, my philosophy has always been do as I do, not just as I say... lead by example.
 
Last edited:

fmo24

Well-Known Member
Joined
Nov 14, 2008
Messages
5,910
Reaction score
3,660
No kids here but several nieces and a nephew One day I was driving my nephew from havasu to San Diego and kid rock was in my cd rotation. He tells me we will have to skip a couple of songs as his parents won’t allow him to hear them. Quite impressed that he would just volunteer that at the moment.
 

HBCraig

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jan 8, 2008
Messages
5,975
Reaction score
4,234
@Bear Down
you would be shocked at all the lyrics of shitty songs kids know. My daughter is 17 and son is 18. I could care less what they are listening to on their phones, just not CNN. But places like on the beach in Havasu, at the ballpark, etc, we will not be cranking shitty gangster shit. As for the movies, mine arent really into sitting for 2 to 3 hours. I can tell you that both of my kids love shows like Band of Brothers and movies like Fury. They ask me why we fought in those wars. Its pretty cool to explain that stuff to them. Sadly, their idiot teachers have never mentioned any of these wars in history. How the F#$! can that be possible?
 

Bear Down

Well-Known Member
Joined
Feb 19, 2011
Messages
653
Reaction score
954
I control the music selection in the house and we play all sort of music... As noted in my original post, during the course of playing classic hip hop/rap... NWA and Too Short came on... It was with my 11 year old son and I wasn't bent out of shape over it, cause like @HBCraig mentioned... current music that they listen to is equally as vulgar to a degree... But it got me thinking as we were driving, but again how do you explain lifestyle choices kids see as you are walking in public spaces.. I just try to be honest with them. I remember walking home from JR high singing songs from NWA with friends... it was just cool period of time being a 1st generation Mexican singing gangsta rap with white/Filipino friends. I turned out just fine... As for movies, I try to expose them to classics and how times used to be and what the meaning of certain movies are. Movies like Step Bros serves zero purpose.... but to each their own right?
 

Singleton

Well-Known Member
Joined
Feb 5, 2008
Messages
13,480
Reaction score
13,578
9yo daughter - We manage the music - any Apple purchase gets reviewed by mom before daughter can download. My biggest concern is what she is watching on the internet, but we have an open door policy (her door has to be open when she is in her room watching TV, or on the internet) and mom and I walk around to monitor that. Movies, we try to keep them under R, but she has watched a few with us.

IMO, I would rather introduce her to something then her friends. So, she can sample (she dislikes the taste, hope that stays) the drinks we have and watch movies that others parents would say no to. Takes the sneaking around excitement out of the activity. My mom allowed me to drink at home when I hit high school. High School parties were fun to attend, but never attended them just to drink like my other friends. Hoping that works for my daughter as well.
 

monkeyswrench

Well-Known Member
Joined
Sep 7, 2018
Messages
12,067
Reaction score
25,436
I'm a bit "different" my kids were pretty much "urban Amish". TV was only on Friday night through Sunday, evenings only. Music, kind of lucky, they all gravitate towards 70's and 80's rock. They do listen to modern stuff, but Five Finger and outlaw country. Suits me fine! For movies, as a family we stay away from the horror/slasher flicks. It's never been my thing since young, but really become worse as older, and seen more "real life" ugliness. Maybe a form of PTSD? Most historical things are a go. We use them like teaching events. The kids will then kind of research the time period involved and see how plausible things were. They're jr high and high school now, but they did watch Blue's Clues and such when little. Pretty much nothing but Disney movies, old and new, until maybe 10 or so.

As for them turning out like me, God, I hope not. I may be somewhat OK now, but that's a damn miracle. It was no fault of my parents. As the song goes, "Mama Tried..."
 

Fenderbender

Well-Known Member
Joined
Apr 28, 2017
Messages
317
Reaction score
364
We sensor for the most part but there is definitely a difference between music that is too much ( profanity, sexuality etc) and then there are songs that use it how we use it LOL.

Family movies for us are anything Adam Sandler


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 

Cdog

Well-Known Member
Joined
Apr 8, 2008
Messages
5,296
Reaction score
6,996
My kids sort of self regulate. I avoid the soft sex scenes in movies. But the shit is everywhere, even in Titanic!!! It's just weird..... I do my best to expose them to the truths of life as it's easy for girls to get rolled in life by a smooth talking ass clowns. My wife listens to top 40 garbage music which is 90% sex, hoe's n pimps & debauchery. Both daughters will tell you they're rockers. They like "dads music" Dirty heads, sublime & Iration.

At the end of the day I dont really hide much from them anymore. I would rather them know how fucked up everything is so they dont get caught up in it. Our society is full of double standards and false promises to entrap the stupid into life mistakes. I hope they can avoid all that shit by knowing the consequences.
 
Last edited:

Bear Down

Well-Known Member
Joined
Feb 19, 2011
Messages
653
Reaction score
954
Born in 76 with a 12 year old son.

I pretty much forbid porn unless it's girl on girl.

Plan is to expose him to the step sister stuff slowly over the next 12 months to ensure we are raising him with good morals and values.
family 1st... CHECK! lol +10
 

Waterjunky

RDP Inmate #94
Joined
Sep 24, 2007
Messages
3,702
Reaction score
2,308
At 5, my son is still very sheltered, I don't listen to getto music so usually classic rock through the 80's (some issues here :rolleyes: ) and lots of country. As for TV and movies, he is still a paw patrol, micky mouse and how its made kid. We have branched out into Scooby Doo in the last year along with ducktails and a few like that. Even many of the cartoons are garbage now. Loony toons and such are soon to enter the blend but we have a few behavior issues we are working on and I don't need him giving the dog the wile coyote treatment just yet.
 

DC-88

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 27, 2012
Messages
1,890
Reaction score
3,013
@Bear Down
Sadly, their idiot teachers have never mentioned any of these wars in history. How the F#$! can that be possible?
That's sad. My wife teaches US history in Ca. and has shown most of the Band of Bros. series in class every year since it came out along with most of the Patriot ( a % of the mormon kids are usually the ones whose parents won't let them watch). I happened to be home one morning this year before her district went back to work from the scam and should have recorded her zoom of D -day, describing the make and mfg. of each landing craft each different country used, the differences between a B-17 and B-24 , the angles the Nazi guns were at in all of the different positions......on and on and on. I hadn't seen her teach in a long time and it was very cool.
We did censor our own kids more than at least I was growing up. As a kid we had access to "on" TV box, playboy channel, horror flicks etc but any little kid with a phone or friends with phones today has access to much more. We let them do some gaming but kept it mostly focused on the sports games with minimal GTA . They ended up with great taste in music eventually, but we always listened to "our" music as a family which wasn't hood music (even though "ours" in high school may have included nwa, nbn, eazy e, the adolescents, fear, DK, you name it ).
My best friend in 3rd grade had a step dad that handed us the bong when we were literally that age , so I always go back to that in my mind as pretty much the all time low I experienced as far as parenting/ censorship goes and made the effort to keep my kids and all their friends at our house as much as possible. It's about spending a lot of time with them and setting a good example. I'll admit I did take mine to see step brothers in the theatre at a baseball tourney in Phoenix when they were pretty young, and we still enjoy that one together along with the one liners.
 

troostr

GOT MILK?
Joined
Dec 18, 2009
Messages
1,444
Reaction score
1,175
75 Vintage here too. I was allowed to watch all the horror flick we could handle, but remember that "Porkey's" was off limits. Having watched it later I really don't know why considering the content of some of what we were allowed to watch. As far as music, I knew better than to come to the house bump'n Too Short.
My kids are all about to have birthdays in the next couple months putting them at 16, 14, and 11. Because of the 11 yo, we still as a family don't go over PG-13, and it's funny how ratings have slid since we were kids. I never took special notice to the tits and sexual references in movies like "Airplane" (PG) until we were watching it and my wife is glaring at me asking what it's rated. They have access to my itunes library with everything from old school Gangster rap, Metal, pop, country, and whatever they ask to download that isn't shit. They know what they are supposed to not be listening to, and if they want to jam a little Too Short, I better not know it- just like it was for me. We do the best we can to teach our kids what's right and wrong and what's appropriate at times is definitely not at others. For us it's the best defense for the outside influences. My oldest was shown porn in 5th grade by a classmate. We saw some soft stuff on his browser and asked about it. He said a kid show it to him on his phone, and told him to check out a site when he got home. We quickly figured out the filters on our modem which helped, but he's a boy and all boy at that. I knew it would happen eventually but hoped it would be a little later on. The limited access and a bunch of open conversations have been, I think,. the best we could do to keep it from becoming an addiction, and he's realized it can become that from some of his peers. My daughter (middle and only girl) is a pageant queen tom boy. She's got the street smarts/common sense and can read through bullshit almost before it's laid out. As a dad, I'm so grateful for that! Now she's in the stage where the little girls are becoming little bitches so a lot of the girls her age talk shit about each other in circles and it drives her nuts. She hangs with the class above her more now since they've moved on from that phase. She came home last week and said she was "this close to laying out" a girl that was once her best friend just a year ago or so because she was "talking out her ass". Our Youngest is the wild card. He's kinda sneaky and prefers the attention be on the older two instead of him. I always tell my wife, he's the one that will turn her grey!
 

Ziggy

SlumLord
Joined
Sep 20, 2007
Messages
31,905
Reaction score
29,604
My children were born 83 and 93.
My basic value was trying not to make them "grow up" sooner than we felt was appropriate. No need to have an 11yo teaching mom how to twerk sort of philosophy. Became rather difficult with the advent of the internet when putting a "block" on sites/usages were not as simple as they are today.
 

DWC

Well-Known Member
Joined
Nov 9, 2012
Messages
6,274
Reaction score
9,765
Didn’t censor movies, music or internet. Tried to guide them on what they should watch, listen to but at the end of the day what they have access to is far beyond what we grew up with. Kids are 20 thru 25 now. Seem to be well adjusted, responsible individuals so it must not have wrecked them to much. I feel we prepared them and taught them to make good decisions. Up to them at some point to be good people.

PS. Was always funny to talk to parents whose kids “didn’t drink, didn’t have boyfriends, couldn’t wear skimpy clothes”. Their kids weren’t who they thought they were. Tell your kid they can’t do something and be ready for the shit show. Tell them why they shouldn’t and let them make the decision.
 

attitude

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jul 30, 2009
Messages
1,600
Reaction score
1,978
Didn’t censor movies, music or internet. Tried to guide them on what they should watch, listen to but at the end of the day what they have access to is far beyond what we grew up with. Kids are 20 thru 25 now. Seem to be well adjusted, responsible individuals so it must not have wrecked them to much. I feel we prepared them and taught them to make good decisions. Up to them at some point to be good people.

PS. Was always funny to talk to parents whose kids “didn’t drink, didn’t have boyfriends, couldn’t wear skimpy clothes”. Their kids weren’t who they thought they were. Tell your kid they can’t do something and be ready for the shit show. Tell them why they shouldn’t and let them make the decision.
Exactly how I was raised, I didn’t have many restrictions I was just taught right from wrong. Now like you said the kids who parents tell them what the can wear, watch, or do are usually completely different when not in sight of there parents or if the parents don’t let them out of there sight they are socially awkward and live at home their whole life.

My son will be raised exactly how I was because it works, or should I not let him watch movies with boobs but then take him to Havasu on holiday weekends lol?
 

DWC

Well-Known Member
Joined
Nov 9, 2012
Messages
6,274
Reaction score
9,765
Exactly how I was raised, I didn’t have many restrictions I was just taught right from wrong. Now like you said the kids who parents tell them what the can wear, watch, or do are usually completely different when not in sight of there parents or if the parents don’t let them out of there sight they are socially awkward and live at home their whole life.

My son will be raised exactly how I was because it works, or should I not let him watch movies with boobs but then take him to Havasu on holiday weekends lol?
Even better to shelter then 100% and send them off to school. Recipe for disaster
 

monkeyswrench

Well-Known Member
Joined
Sep 7, 2018
Messages
12,067
Reaction score
25,436
I like @Ziggy 's logic. Let them grow up, but don't make them act older/be older. My daughter is 17 now, but she doesn't choose to dress proactively, and remains just kind of a country girl. Some of her classmates could be on a street corner. Her choices, not mine or mom's.
 

SKIDMARC

Well-Known Member
Joined
Sep 30, 2011
Messages
2,889
Reaction score
2,448
I was born in 81. Son is 11 Daughter is 7. Kids watch allot of Youtube and Netflix. We try to sensor as much as we can, my wife more than I but at the end of the day they are going to hear and see it somewhere. We do have restrictions on my sons phone, but if he is going to look for it he will find it, whatever he is looking for. I told my wife, I knew what I was looking for at 11-12 year old LOL. And I didn't have the internet!

Movies- they mostly watch family friendly stuff, but we do allow some that we probably shouldn't. Such as Bad Moms Christmas and Bad Moms Christmas 2 (Those are hilarious if you haven't seen them) and when I can sneek it in others such as Casino, Good Fellas. But my wife gets a little pissed.

Music-I have listen to 2Pac, DJ quick, Sublime etc with my son not daughter, I know double standard. Once again my wife gets pissed. Kids listen to pop and country mostly.

I look at it like I would rather expose them to it then someone else. My mom also allowed me to drink when I was in High School as long as I stayed home. I plan on doing the same with the kids, wife allowing it of course. I think the more freedom you give your kids the more less likely they are going to go all bat shit crazy.

My mom was super strict with my older sister and brother. My sister was pregnant at 16 and took off, she is back now but there has been issues even in her adult life. Brother did two prison sentences by 23. He got his shit together, got married bought a home but that all fell apart again. Now he is living on the streets somewhere in AZ on drugs. She changed her style with my twin sister and I. It worked.

Life is about choices, I think we should give our kids one and see what happens.
 
Last edited:

Cole Trickle

Member
Joined
Sep 25, 2007
Messages
22,058
Reaction score
11,852
Today's kids will never know the thrill of trying to make out tits out of a bunch of wavy lines on forbidden channels.

Sad really

Correct they also won't know what its like to be able to sneak out of the house due to the 5 cameras i have up or be able to make mistakes without it being saved to the cloud for future persecution.

I was a pretty good kid but by todays standards if people would have caught even a 1/4 of the crap we got away with i would be in prison...haha
 

farmo83

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jun 9, 2008
Messages
1,693
Reaction score
1,242
Correct they also won't know what its like to be able to sneak out of the house due to the 5 cameras i have up or be able to make mistakes without it being saved to the cloud for future persecution.

I was a pretty good kid but by todays standards if people would have caught even a 1/4 of the crap we got away with i would be in prison...haha
Preach!!!!
 

DWC

Well-Known Member
Joined
Nov 9, 2012
Messages
6,274
Reaction score
9,765
Correct they also won't know what its like to be able to sneak out of the house due to the 5 cameras i have up or be able to make mistakes without it being saved to the cloud for future persecution.

I was a pretty good kid but by todays standards if people would have caught even a 1/4 of the crap we got away with i would be in prison...haha
The Wyze camera on our front door mysteriously went down a couple times. My tech savvy kid claimed he didn’t know what happened. All good until he forgot to plug it back in.. :oops:
 

attitude

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jul 30, 2009
Messages
1,600
Reaction score
1,978
The Wyze camera on our front door mysteriously went down a couple times. My tech savvy kid claimed he didn’t know what happened. All good until he forgot to plug it back in.. :oops:
I had to teach my 16 year old brother how to sneak out of the house on the side yard so the camera didn’t catch him because his dumb ass decided to drive his truck to a party while his parents were at the river. The camera points right at his truck... because of that I had to go pick him up in the middle of the night lol.
 

Javajoe

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jun 15, 2020
Messages
944
Reaction score
1,705
Born in 66, girls are 33 and 34. Never sheltered them, taught them to respect others and themselves. Never monitored them much except curfews and MySpace crap. Think they had AIM before that. Grew up to be great women. Most sheltered kids I have seen grow up have social issues and no clue about the real world. Lots of fucked up parents out there who shelter their kids thinking they are doing them a favor and other ones who do drugs with their kids or around them and just set real bad examples then wonder why their kids are fucked up. 🤦‍♂️
 
Top