Tom Brown
Epsilon contributor
- Joined
- Sep 20, 2007
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"Tom, what should I look for when shopping for a pepper mill?"
I do my best to council those who ask but I can only do so much. People aren't very bright.
They typically want to go to a high end kitchen center and pick up a nice brushed stainless steel mill, perhaps made in Germany, with high quality machine work, a big pepper corn hopper, and a mill that grinds perfectly flaked pepper. Fortunately, they came to me prior to going to the kitchen center.
The mill you want is the old wooden piece of shit that's sitting on top of your stove right now. You know, the chipped wooden body one with the mill retainer that's held in place by tiny nails; the one that doesn't grind quite right. It only grinds for about 30 degrees of each rotation and free-wheels the rest. The one you have to shake to see if there are any pepper corns in it because it doesn't seem to be grinding.
If you must buy new, get the lowest grade garbage you can find. It needs to be made in china using no tools other than a rock and a stick.
What you're looking for are uneven flakes. You want a nice peppery taste but with the occasional chunk of pepper corn that jams your molars open like a stray tailing of dimensional lumber that finds it's way under a sheet of plywood, not allowing it to rest flat.
When you get those little blocks jammed in your back teeth, and this is what you so desperately want, there is a moment of hesitation when you think... WTF???..... and then you realize what it is and bite down. That bite will reward you with a zesty flavor explosion the likes of which has not been experienced since the Hubba Bubba guy shaved his head.
Mmmmmm
I do my best to council those who ask but I can only do so much. People aren't very bright.
They typically want to go to a high end kitchen center and pick up a nice brushed stainless steel mill, perhaps made in Germany, with high quality machine work, a big pepper corn hopper, and a mill that grinds perfectly flaked pepper. Fortunately, they came to me prior to going to the kitchen center.
The mill you want is the old wooden piece of shit that's sitting on top of your stove right now. You know, the chipped wooden body one with the mill retainer that's held in place by tiny nails; the one that doesn't grind quite right. It only grinds for about 30 degrees of each rotation and free-wheels the rest. The one you have to shake to see if there are any pepper corns in it because it doesn't seem to be grinding.
If you must buy new, get the lowest grade garbage you can find. It needs to be made in china using no tools other than a rock and a stick.
What you're looking for are uneven flakes. You want a nice peppery taste but with the occasional chunk of pepper corn that jams your molars open like a stray tailing of dimensional lumber that finds it's way under a sheet of plywood, not allowing it to rest flat.
When you get those little blocks jammed in your back teeth, and this is what you so desperately want, there is a moment of hesitation when you think... WTF???..... and then you realize what it is and bite down. That bite will reward you with a zesty flavor explosion the likes of which has not been experienced since the Hubba Bubba guy shaved his head.
Mmmmmm
