WELCOME TO RIVER DAVES PLACE

Stuff you do that your wife hates?

napanutt

Connoisseur
Joined
Dec 19, 2007
Messages
7,234
Reaction score
6,490
Well fuck. I was wanting to maybe comment on one or two of these....

Too many to chose from now.
My selective hearing drives her nuts
Me and wife are always going “HUH” to each other. 😬
I'm gonna guess you posting this thread on Thanksgiving ain't gonna get you laid tonight!

😁
What is this laid you speak of? 😳
 

Mandelon

Coffee makes me poop.
Joined
Sep 24, 2007
Messages
10,962
Reaction score
10,280
My wife bought a container of delicious peppermint bark candy. I bugged her to give me a few pieces. So she finally opened it up and gave me a few. Then she hid the box. She was drinking when she stashed it. Now we can't find it. LOL.
 

Cobalt232

Well-Known Member
Joined
Dec 26, 2018
Messages
504
Reaction score
530
I wanted to watch the dog show today. Wife would have none of that. She got pissed and went upstairs and turned on the Hallmark channel for some stupid show there.
 

500bbc

Well-Known Member
Joined
Oct 16, 2007
Messages
21,376
Reaction score
26,591
Fucking light weights, you have to have so many honey does going at once that there is no way they can focus on one, keep.them all essential...
 

Jimmyv

Well-Known Member
Joined
Apr 4, 2020
Messages
131
Reaction score
377
When shes upset and tells me a problem and I offer a solution. She’s pissed. Like who am I to offer a resolution. Says she just needs to vent.

When she’s upset and tells me a problem and I don’t have any input. She’s pissed. I don’t communicate enough and am not invested in her problems.
 

SoCalDave

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jul 1, 2011
Messages
8,375
Reaction score
14,562
All of the above minus the smoking that literally drove her fucking nuts. Decided to myself I was done with it on Jun 7, 2011. She's still pissed that I just quit like that after 26 years of riding my ass about it. 😁
 

TrollerDave

Well-Known Member
Joined
Mar 8, 2008
Messages
1,943
Reaction score
2,841
My wife bought a container of delicious peppermint bark candy. I bugged her to give me a few pieces. So she finally opened it up and gave me a few. Then she hid the box. She was drinking when she stashed it. Now we can't find it. LOL.
I hate it when I find it, eat it, by myself of course, and then the next day she’s says” where’s the candy? Did you eat that whole thing?!”
it’s been missing for a month with no mention of ownership or intention.
Finders Keepers!
 

Flyinbowtie

Well-Known Member
Joined
Sep 25, 2007
Messages
11,335
Reaction score
6,866
As most of us are men, we suffer from distraction. You know the drill, you're fixing something and you realize in order to finish this task, you have to fix something else, and so on, so that your original task is left incomplete for now. We'll get that first thing done, but after we do a couple other things. This is normal and it bugs all wives.

And of course you need all those tools out, so there's no point in putting them away right now, since you'll just have to get them out again later. My wife hates the pile of tools in the entry hall. I admit that I do this.

The other thing. Butter. I take a stick of butter and rub it on my toast. Like a roll-on deoderant. Or I will butter a cooking pan the same way. I just rub the stick on there. Of course it leaves the stick all melty and bent and sometimes with crumbs on it. She uses the tub o butter instead.

What's your butter stick?

We have been married 40 years, been together 44.
Are you kidding? Everything is my Butter stick.

Lets see...
Well. I am a man. Therefore, I am wrong.
This is how she would like to summarize it. Sadly, I am rarely wrong about anything I decide to take a stand on, which REALLY pisses her off.'
Prime example this afternoon. Or local son has moved into new digs, only been there twice, we were invited for T-Day.
She drives her car, I am passenger.
We get close and she fires up her google machine to get directions. Does not trust me and my Man Brain (upper division) to get her there.
"Honey, we should have turned right back there".
"No...my google machine says we go down here and go across the freeway"
I consider this. I know it is wrong, it is actually bass-awkwards and will take us in precisely the wrong direction. I consider my options.
"Ok babe"
15 minutes go by, nothing looks familiar.
She pulls over, examines google machine, makes her pronouncement.
"This is not the right way."
"Yes, I know"
"Well why didn't you say something, dammit?"
"ahh...I did.
"Well &^$0do!@#$"
She turns around, examines google machine again, does another 180, heads off in the right direction....and passes the correct turn, again.
"Honey, we should have turned right back there."
"No, the google machine says we keep going this way"
"The google machine just got done taking us 3 miles in the wrong direction, now it is taking us in the wrong direction again."
Silence.
10 minutes later we pass the sign says we are leaving the city he lives in, entering county area.
Abruptly pulls over again, exasperated sounds, starts with re-loading google machine, makes new pronouncement.
"OK....I know where we are going."
I....I can/t help myself sometimes. Call it what you like, a death wish....whatever.
I say it.
"Yes, so do I. We are going to our sons house for Thanksgiving Dinner. In fact, if you will listen to me and turn left up there at that street we have now passed 3 times, we will be there in less than 10 minutes:"
She makes the turn, and shazzam, we arrive 5 minutes later.
Son is in driveway.
"Geez guys where ya been?"
"Your FATHER would not help me with directions, he got us all screwed up back down there, I don't know what he was thinking."

See...I are the Man. Therefore, I are wrong...and here is the kicker. I ARE WRONG, EVEN WHEN I ARE RIGHT.
 

CarolynandBob

Well-Known Member
Joined
Nov 22, 2016
Messages
719
Reaction score
1,027
That I do not hear/ remember when she tells me something.

Her mom told her after our wedding that I would stop listening to her.

It is not that women talk it is that they talk so damn much.

Actually, it is kind of my fault. When I do something I am totally focused on it and ignore anything else. I have tried to get her to only talk during commercials, but doesn't work.
 

Mandelon

Coffee makes me poop.
Joined
Sep 24, 2007
Messages
10,962
Reaction score
10,280
My wife is the one with the distracted hearing. I'll say something to her. She waits, 3..2...1... then say "HUH?" So I have to repeat it. Before I finish, she now has an answer. So she DID hear me.

I figured out she says "huh" as a stalling tactic. It gives her more time to think about the answer.
 

musicFunsun

I Love BoBo!!!
Joined
Dec 20, 2007
Messages
5,514
Reaction score
1,621
We have been married 40 years, been together 44.
Are you kidding? Everything is my Butter stick.

Lets see...
Well. I am a man. Therefore, I am wrong.
This is how she would like to summarize it. Sadly, I am rarely wrong about anything I decide to take a stand on, which REALLY pisses her off.'
Prime example this afternoon. Or local son has moved into new digs, only been there twice, we were invited for T-Day.
She drives her car, I am passenger.
We get close and she fires up her google machine to get directions. Does not trust me and my Man Brain (upper division) to get her there.
"Honey, we should have turned right back there".
"No...my google machine says we go down here and go across the freeway"
I consider this. I know it is wrong, it is actually bass-awkwards and will take us in precisely the wrong direction. I consider my options.
"Ok babe"
15 minutes go by, nothing looks familiar.
She pulls over, examines google machine, makes her pronouncement.
"This is not the right way."
"Yes, I know"
"Well why didn't you say something, dammit?"
"ahh...I did.
"Well &^$0do!@#$"
She turns around, examines google machine again, does another 180, heads off in the right direction....and passes the correct turn, again.
"Honey, we should have turned right back there."
"No, the google machine says we keep going this way"
"The google machine just got done taking us 3 miles in the wrong direction, now it is taking us in the wrong direction again."
Silence.
10 minutes later we pass the sign says we are leaving the city he lives in, entering county area.
Abruptly pulls over again, exasperated sounds, starts with re-loading google machine, makes new pronouncement.
"OK....I know where we are going."
I....I can/t help myself sometimes. Call it what you like, a death wish....whatever.
I say it.
"Yes, so do I. We are going to our sons house for Thanksgiving Dinner. In fact, if you will listen to me and turn left up there at that street we have now passed 3 times, we will be there in less than 10 minutes:"
She makes the turn, and shazzam, we arrive 5 minutes later.
Son is in driveway.
"Geez guys where ya been?"
"Your FATHER would not help me with directions, he got us all screwed up back down there, I don't know what he was thinking."

See...I are the Man. Therefore, I are wrong...and here is the kicker. I ARE WRONG, EVEN WHEN I ARE RIGHT.
Sig line material : well, I’ll a man therefore I’m wrong 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
 

baja-chris

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 26, 2019
Messages
69
Reaction score
112
She hates it when I spend money to go racing. And she was really pissed when I bought a 911 TT-S without telling her. Kept it in another town I flew into for work. She only found out months later when XM sent a letter congratulating me on my new P-car and soliciting an XM subscription. Bastards!
 

TITTIES AND BEER

Well-Known Member
Joined
Sep 28, 2007
Messages
11,983
Reaction score
10,325
So I’m setting here on the couch in my new Sox’s my wifey bought me ( me being hard o hearing 😉) she says “ I am so fascinated with your cock 😎👍 “ I said as I stood up and dropped wranglers Lets go 👍👍👍 Your Sox’s you dumb shit your Sox’s 😫bitch 😳
 

SoCalDave

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jul 1, 2011
Messages
8,375
Reaction score
14,562
Well today we went on a road trip through Joshua Tree with what appeared to be the day that 1M+ Asians went as well.
She needs to go to the bathroom at Skull Rock (only outhouse around) and I'm trying to get into the area and "I" have to make a u-turn. She starts going off with her usual you should do this or you should do that and I asked her "you want to fukin drive", her reply was "no because you'll start telling me what to do"...😡
Stopped the truck and put it park as I look at her and said "exactly so STFU"

It was a speechless ride back to Indio...I'm out back having a beer now. 😁
 

TITTIES AND BEER

Well-Known Member
Joined
Sep 28, 2007
Messages
11,983
Reaction score
10,325
Well today we went on a road trip through Joshua Tree with what appeared to be the day that 1M+ Asians went as well.
She needs to go to the bathroom at Skull Rock (only outhouse around) and I'm trying to get into the area and "I" have to make a u-turn. She starts going off with her usual you should do this or you should do that and I asked her "you want to fukin drive", her reply was "no because you'll start telling me what to do"...😡
Stopped the truck and put it park as I look at her and said "exactly so STFU"

It was a speechless ride back to Indio...I'm out back having a beer now. 😁
Good for you stand your ground !😎😳
 

TITTIES AND BEER

Well-Known Member
Joined
Sep 28, 2007
Messages
11,983
Reaction score
10,325
Update:. I found the peppermint bark! It was stashed behind the dish towels!

I'm watching golf. Mickelson and Charles Barkley vs Peyton Manning and Stephen Curry. Of course it was time to vacuum ... LOL.
Empty the box and tell her you found it that way them break some out while watching Tv 😉
 

coolchange

Lower level functionary
Joined
Jan 1, 2008
Messages
5,723
Reaction score
5,821
Well today we went on a road trip through Joshua Tree with what appeared to be the day that 1M+ Asians went as well.
She needs to go to the bathroom at Skull Rock (only outhouse around) and I'm trying to get into the area and "I" have to make a u-turn. She starts going off with her usual you should do this or you should do that and I asked her "you want to fukin drive", her reply was "no because you'll start telling me what to do"...😡
Stopped the truck and put it park as I look at her and said "exactly so STFU"

It was a speechless ride back to Indio...I'm out back having a beer now. 😁
You went to Joshua tree on Thanksgiving and that was your only punishment? You got off easy.
 
Top