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The past few months....

Flying_Lavey

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I gave myself a little RDP vacation a few weeks ago because I felt like I was starting to take out my anger and frustrations on here more than I ever had before, and I wasn't happy with it. We have been having a LOT going on since the beginning of the year. Tough transitions as work with management changes, oldest kids cheer, but more impactful has been the repeated health issues of my 2 youngest and my wife. Which has been adding to the strain at work obviously.

I came back and am sharing this because, I don't know what to do. My parents are out of town and because of that, I am extremely limited on who i can ask to help watch the kids when one of the kids or the wife has to go to the hospital. And because it has been happening so much lately, it's beginning to compromise my job (work hasn't been a great situation anyways, but this would compromise any other position I could change to as well).

We don't have any money to pay for child care, and the 2 youngest having feeding tubes so most child care providers won't take them anyways. We don't have any other family around that would consistently be able to help.

I'm just looking for advice for this. The wealth of knowledge and experience here is second to none so, what better place to ask? Does anybody know of any programs or groups that help with this sort of thing in the Simi area?
 

hallett21

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Sorry to hear. Does the hospital have any resources?
 

racektm

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I gave myself a little RDP vacation a few weeks ago because I felt like I was starting to take out my anger and frustrations on here more than I ever had before, and I wasn't happy with it. We have been having a LOT going on since the beginning of the year. Tough transitions as work with management changes, oldest kids cheer, but more impactful has been the repeated health issues of my 2 youngest and my wife. Which has been adding to the strain at work obviously.

I came back and am sharing this because, I don't know what to do. My parents are out of town and because of that, I am extremely limited on who i can ask to help watch the kids when one of the kids or the wife has to go to the hospital. And because it has been happening so much lately, it's beginning to compromise my job (work hasn't been a great situation anyways, but this would compromise any other position I could change to as well).

We don't have any money to pay for child care, and the 2 youngest having feeding tubes so most child care providers won't take them anyways. We don't have any other family around that would consistently be able to help.

I'm just looking for advice for this. The wealth of knowledge and experience here is second to none so, what better place to ask? Does anybody know of any programs or groups that help with this sort of thing in the Simi area?
These people should be able to help or at least point you in the right direction. We have a special needs child in Agoura Hills for years, while this service is for Ventura county, we used the LA county counterpart,


Good luck,
 

rivermobster

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Social worker at the closest hospital maybe??

So sorry to hear about your troubles. Hope you get back on track soon. 👍🏼
 

Flying_Lavey

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These people should be able to help or at least point you in the right direction. We have a special needs child in Agoura Hills for years, while this service is for Ventura county, we used the LA county counterpart,


Good luck,
Unfortunately tri-counties is taking their sweet old time getting the 2 youngest kids cases set-up. I'm hoping there are resources with them once they are finally set-up, but not much of an option yet.
 

racektm

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Unfortunately tri-counties is taking their sweet old time getting the 2 youngest kids cases set-up. I'm hoping there are resources with them once they are finally set-up, but not much of an option yet.
Like I said, we used North County Regional Center, but I imagine they are similar. My ex wife is a pretty good and fierce advocate for our son, the louder you yell, the better they listen in most cases.

Again, good luck to you.
 

Flying_Lavey

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Sorry to hear. Does the hospital have any resources?
Social worker at the closest hospital maybe??

So sorry to hear about your troubles. Hope you get back on track soon. 👍🏼
Kaiser has a social worked we have talked to before and I'm trying to figure out how to get ahold of her now, but I don't think they have much of anything like that. But I am intending to still ask.
 

rivermobster

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Kaiser has a social worked we have talked to before and I'm trying to figure out how to get ahold of her now, but I don't think they have much of anything like that. But I am intending to still ask.

If you have Kaiser...

Maybe use the app? From the home screen click "Get Care Now".

Mine says 45 min wait time for video or phone.

Couldn't hurt to give that a shot?
 

Flying_Lavey

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If you have Kaiser...

Maybe use the app? From the home screen click "Get Care Now".

Mine says 45 min wait time for video or phone.

Couldn't hurt to give that a shot?
I just did a chat with them and no dice, but the person on the other end seemed a bit miffed so I just got the number to the medical social services department and left a voicemail.
 

rivermobster

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I just did a chat with them and no dice, but the person on the other end seemed a bit miffed so I just got the number to the medical social services department and left a voicemail.

Sucks. Hopefully someone gets back to you soon.
 

HNL2LHC

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I agree that you should reach out to Kaiser. They have a lot of programs available. I know that when the parents/grandparents age there is a section called palliative care. They will help you find resources and service to assist. When my wife was having medical issues they had a social worker that helped us find housing. Some of it free if needed even to us. I felt that even though we qualified others needed more than us and we paid full price. I am sure someone on RDP works at Kaiser and will give additional thoughts.

Best of luck to you at this difficult time. Be sure to keep yourself healthy and if needed reach out for help for yourself. I was fortunate that my mother was close so she had my back. If not I woudl have certainly reached out. Don’t be hard on yourself that think that you can’t hack it. It is that you can hack it that you reach out.

If you need ANYTHING reach out and I am sure you will get what you need.

Take care!!!!
 

Havasu blue label

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Kaiser has a social worked we have talked to before and I'm trying to figure out how to get ahold of her now, but I don't think they have much of anything like that. But I am intending to still ask.
Try the local health office they should offer some guidance and possibly some type of government home care for the kids maybe daycare try the city hall for programs that can help
 

Boatymcboatface

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I’ll see if my mom has any links or ideas she was a nurse for the county health department for 30yrs. She worked with children with heath or mental/learning disabilities once they were in home care and helped find them assistance when needed
 

Skinny Tire AH

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I gave myself a little RDP vacation a few weeks ago because I felt like I was starting to take out my anger and frustrations on here more than I ever had before, and I wasn't happy with it. We have been having a LOT going on since the beginning of the year. Tough transitions as work with management changes, oldest kids cheer, but more impactful has been the repeated health issues of my 2 youngest and my wife. Which has been adding to the strain at work obviously.

I came back and am sharing this because, I don't know what to do. My parents are out of town and because of that, I am extremely limited on who i can ask to help watch the kids when one of the kids or the wife has to go to the hospital. And because it has been happening so much lately, it's beginning to compromise my job (work hasn't been a great situation anyways, but this would compromise any other position I could change to as well).

We don't have any money to pay for child care, and the 2 youngest having feeding tubes so most child care providers won't take them anyways. We don't have any other family around that would consistently be able to help.

I'm just looking for advice for this. The wealth of knowledge and experience here is second to none so, what better place to ask? Does anybody know of any programs or groups that help with this sort of thing in the Simi area?
Are your two on tubes enrolled in your state DDD? (dept of developmental disability) Your state may have different acronym for it. My son is allowed care provided by Arizona. Its all based on Brian's needs and his income, which he has none. He gets significant; respite, habilitation and attendant care. It really helps us out. We get (I think) over 40 hours a week.

It’s been a struggle to find a person who fit our busy lifestyle. They want the money but don't wan't to do anything for it.

Good luck. I feel your pain Brother.
 
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RiverDave

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Man that’s tough, I am really sorry to hear you are going through this..
 

Flying_Lavey

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Thank you guys. I reached out to Kaiser and they didn't have anything, but their social services department is awesome and had several places for me to call. They suggested first would be to try Tri-counties (Ventura, Santa Barbara, and San Luis Obispo county version of AZ's DDD) as they know they offer some stuff. I'm hoping them dragging their feet setting up the little girls cases won't effect getting something lined up. Luckily my uncle is able to watch them tomorrow and Friday if needed. Doctor did say they expect to discharge tomorrow, assuming tonight goes ok.
 

RIVERBORN

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Man… our system is so broken that if u were on the street or didn’t want to work you’d probably be taken care of. That aside,, is child care your main objective? Maybe a go fund for a little extra cushion? I know my nephew had a traumatic brain accident, my cousins wife basically gets paid to stay home and take care of him. Would state disability be an option for the kids?
 

Flying_Lavey

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Man… our system is so broken that if u were on the street or didn’t want to work you’d probably be taken care of. That aside,, is child care your main objective? Maybe a go fund for a little extra cushion? I know my nephew had a traumatic brain accident, my cousins wife basically gets paid to stay home and take care of him. Would state disability be an option for the kids?
Once tricounties finishes their stuff my wife can qualify to get IHSS from the state. We are already almost a year into that process and are barely getting to the 2nd step so.... god only knows.
 

NicPaus

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Stay strong 💪. Tough situation you are in. If I lived a little closer I would help you out watching them.
 

rrrr

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All I can offer is strength and energy waves. My best to you and your family.
 

Socalx09

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Once tricounties finishes their stuff my wife can qualify to get IHSS from the state. We are already almost a year into that process and are barely getting to the 2nd step so.... god only knows.
Just to clarify- is your wife signing up to be the provider for IHSS for the kids or is she the recipient? You both can sign up if it’s for the kids so incase either of you are unable to be present at the time, the other can then still claim the hours allotted. Also, make sure to fill out the live in provider paperwork for IHSS. Income will be tax exempt.

I have been the provider for my grandma for a number of years. So if you have any questions about IHSS, please let me know.

Praying for you all.
 

Flying_Lavey

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Just to clarify- is your wife signing up to be the provider for IHSS for the kids or is she the recipient? You both can sign up if it’s for the kids so incase either of you are unable to be present at the time, the other can then still claim the hours allotted. Also, make sure to fill out the live in provider paperwork for IHSS. Income will be tax exempt.

I have been the provider for my grandma for a number of years. So if you have any questions about IHSS, please let me know.

Praying for you all.
Um.... provider? I'm not sure on the correct terminology.

I figured I would reach out to you when we got closer because I remember you saying you were a caregiver or what not for your grandma. We have to get the medical waiver first to get medical for supplemental insurance before we can apply for IHSS.
 

Socalx09

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Um.... provider? I'm not sure on the correct terminology.

I figured I would reach out to you when we got closer because I remember you saying you were a caregiver or what not for your grandma. We have to get the medical waiver first to get medical for supplemental insurance before we can apply for IHSS.
Provider is the caretaker and recipient is the person receiving care.

Yes whatever questions you have, I will do my best to help. They have changed the way they evaluate how many hours you get a month for IHSS so I can help guide you with that. They also have online trainings to get bonuses and further provide medical training that I just learned about a few months ago.

Thinking of you and your family a lot. I know how draining and stressful this can be.
 
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