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Unfortunately I have to ask, Divorce Attorney recommendations in Riverside County?

4Waters

4Waters
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Sad but true. When my ex walked after 30 years of marriage (no young kids) I looked up what the laws were. Explained to her what she and I would end up with and asked if she wanted to piss through $50,000 in attorney fees to end up with the same thing or do it ourselves. We hired an attorney/ mediator for $1,800.00 wrote up who gets what. the attorney made sure it was legal and would be signed by the judge. Sold the house and split the money. Split all the investments down the middle. I paid her for half the boat and the Harley that I kept, sold the other Harley and split the money. The one sticking point was my tools (about 35K worth). She wanted to be paid for half. I told her no. That we would split them up and she could take half of them. She dropped it. Also said that since I was a dirt bike rider when we met that she would not go for half of any of the dirt bikes and equipment. As far as the household stuff I told her to take whatever she wanted.

It’s much better to bend and get it over with quickly. I hope it works out for you.
Some friends of ours were very cordial about it. They didn't even get an attorney/mediator involved. They wrote everything up (kids included) themselves had it notarized went infront of a judge, judge asked both parties if they were OK with it both said yes, he think about it and make any changes you would like and I will see you back in 6 months. They went back in 6 months and he signed their divorce papers, done. They just grew apart, no fighting, cheating or anything, they are actually still really good friends.
 

riverroyal

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Speaking from the other side.... 🙄 I had a lawyer, my ex did not, we did kind of a hybrid, mediator, he represented himself. Welcome to California, she gets half even if it's not in her name, I had the house and vehicles, and a boat in my name, and he walked with a nice chunk of change, and an F250.... It's a shit sandwich, get a layer, if for anything but solid advise, even if you can do mediation. Leave the marriage with zero emotion, no hate, no sadness, treat it like a business transaction. Like others have said, it gets better with time. Best of luck...
First who is this?

Next, keeping the house was a good call
 

HB2Havasu

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Sad but true. When my ex walked after 30 years of marriage (no young kids) I looked up what the laws were. Explained to her what she and I would end up with and asked if she wanted to piss through $50,000 in attorney fees to end up with the same thing or do it ourselves. We hired an attorney/ mediator for $1,800.00 and wrote up who gets what. The attorney made sure it was legal and would be signed by the judge. Sold the house and split the money. Split all the investments down the middle. I paid her for half the boat and the Harley that I kept, sold the other Harley and split the money. The one sticking point was my tools (about 35K worth). She wanted to be paid for half. I told her no. That we would split them up and she could take half of them. She dropped it. Also said that since I was a dirt bike rider when we met that she would not go for half of any of the dirt bikes and equipment. As far as the household stuff I told her to take whatever she wanted.

It’s much better to bend and get it over with quickly. I hope it works out for you.
Your lucky your Ex wasn’t a shitbag like mine was! She basically wanted 100% of the assets, half my income, and leave me with all the bills. Lawyers fix those problems, lol. Karma Happens!!! She now lives with her new minimum wage husband in Cathedral City in a 1 bedroom apartment. 💩
 

Wasn’t Me

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I'm sorry to hear your in this position bud..... But like the others have said above it will pass... And usually works out for the better. Unfortunately I have been in your position a number of years back and had to deal with a difficult x partner and three kids together.. Like many men I really felt that she had the upper hand for some reason so of course I looked for legal help.. I didn't know where to start so the only thing I came up with was I wanted a legal team that was as close to the court house as possible. I really scored as the team I connected with was great and the really made me feel a lot more confident. Long story short they did a great job for me and the outcome was exactly what it should have been. The court system is not as one sided as it use to be and us Men/fathers have just as much rights as the woman. Below is the information for the team I used. I wish you well.!

 

cofooter

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Do it yourself if you and the soon to be ex can and avoid lawyers. Use them to review the final documents only. Use a mediator if you have to. You should find plenty of information in Ca to help estimate the financial outcome. Child support is a calculation, alimony should be straight forward depending on number of years together, assets, and income disparity. You don't say how many years you were marrried but, if you can, make the alimony contractual, vs under court jurisdiction, it's a good piece of mind that you have a specific end date and amount for alimony vs the ex taking you back to court in the future for more/or longer payments. I always worried that if the ex was unable to work for some health reason I would be screwed forever............. vs just 8 yrs.
 

Wedgy

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No one wants to admit their marriage is a failure, but it has come to that point for me. I can scroll through Yelp and Google reviews for days, but I would prefer to get some suggestions from personal experiences. I am on the western border of riverside county, someone in that area would be ideal.
It's all good, until it's not.
I'm going to be brutal because She will. If She's ignoring you now,, f that itch. I guarantee you She's already fkin you over. Fook her first. Sad but True. Do it now. He who files first is in control. Then. YOU get to pick which court. One convenient to YOU. Riverside's a big County. Your attorney should be very familiar with the jurisdiction and the judges involved. It's all what the Man in the Black Robes believes.

She will get the House, the Kid's, the car, and half your paycheck. Hope your kids are near grown.

Whatever you do, make absolutely sure she cannot touch your pensions.
Good luck.
 

Wasn’t Me

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It's all good, until it's not.
I'm going to be brutal because She will. If She's ignoring you now,, f that itch. I guarantee you She's already fkin you over. Fook her first. Sad but True. Do it now. He who files first is in control. Then. YOU get to pick which court. One convenient to YOU. Riverside's a big County. Your attorney should be very familiar with the jurisdiction and the judges involved. It's all what the Man in the Black Robes believes.

She will get the House, the Kid's, the car, and half your paycheck. Hope your kids are near grown.

Whatever you do, make absolutely sure she cannot touch your pensions.
Good luck.
I agree with filing first.... But the rest I do NOT agree. Unless you have documented issues the court system doesn't care who is a drunk. cheater, or lair.. All they care about is how the adults will handle the kids.. No one gets more than half of the moneys unless you have a bad pre-agreement. And lets be honest... When we get married we all accept the risk of losing more than just money.
 

warpt71

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Fuck, this hits close to home. The D word has come up regularly in the last month. I dont know how you guys do it, its making me sick, I cant focus or sleep and I know Ive been an asshole lately.

@3.Slow I dont really know you, but if you need someone to talk/vent to Im here, maybe were in the same boat?
 

boatnam2

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Terrible deal to go through, wish you the best on it. The emotional part is tough but you will get over and you will feel way better soon, the financial part can last a long time so do whatever it takes to get that part right.
 

Cray Paper

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Divorce can be a nasty life experience, mine was about as nasty as they come. I posted my thoughts almost real time on this site and my ex and her little POS attorney threatened me for doing so, she called me at work one day saying the Seattle police department was involved because of my comments on RDP. Just know It can get nasty, more so than you can comprehend, but as most people on this site told me at the time, ,your life it will get better. Mine did at a degree I could have never comprehended or hoped for. It sucked going through the process but I came out so much better at the end.

Hang in their man. It isn't easy, and I say that because shit that is said about you is just that, just unfounded words. It wont mean anything in the long run, keep your focus on what matters most, and that is you and your kids.
 

Angler

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If the Love is gone, it's gone. Your marriage is now a business deal. You MUST get your kids at least 50% of the time. Let her take what she wants from the house. Do not sleep anywhere else but the master bedroom. Start there and see how you can work out much as possible without lawyers. Each should make a list of must haves and go from there.
 

Cray Paper

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For anyone going through divorce, keep your thoughts focused on the future. If you have children, set aside all the anxiety, anger, past experiences with the ex wife. Its fucking hard to do, but do not put value on the shit you have accumulated with the ex wife. The "I worked hard and ignored my family" excuse to get ahead thought process will only add to your heartache and will be the main reason you will have to pay maintenance. Western States will only punish you for your reality when you go to court.

When women are done with you they are done and they cannot see it differently, and the low life scum bag attorneys they hire only feed on women's natural affinity to dissociate and blame their ex and go for the jugular. That is my experience, and it cost me a bunch of money in attorney fees and left me shell shocked and agreed to a settlement that wasn't fair and equitable. My ex has operated outside the bounds of our "settlement" but is not capable of understanding her reality. If I had a bunch of money in the bank I could rake her over the coals but she would use that to influence my sons further against me. That's the shit I have to deal with after the brutality of my divorce.

I hope your ex is more in touch with reality and not like my ex, just know if it goes sideways it will always be detrimental for you if your ex isn't someone in touch with reality.
 
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